Every Day Do One Thing

Our Book Cover Finalists are Here!

2012-01-12T00:01:00.002-05:00

Window Cover

White Flower Cover

Black Flower Cover

I love them all, but only one can be chosen.

Help Me to Choose a New Cover for My Novel

2012-01-10T23:47:00.001-05:00

Help Me Choose a Book Cover

I have completely revised my first novel, MRS. TUESDAY'S DEPARTURE. Turns out that was the easy part. I've spent the last few days tormenting my friends and family trying to decide on a new cover for the book which will be coming out as an ebook and in paperback.

Now I'm appealing to you.

Which is your favorite?

No. 1

No. 2

No. 3

No. 4

No. 5

No. 6

No. 7

No. 8

And just in case you're one of those sticklers who actually want to know what the book is about before deciding...here's a brief synopsis:

Faith is the evidence of things not seen...

Hungary's fragile alliance with Germany kept Natalie and her family out of harm's way for most of the war, but as the Führer's desperation grows during the waning years of the conflict, so does the threat to anyone in its path. Natalie's sister, Ilona, married a Jewish man, putting both her and her young daughter, Mila, in peril. Natalie is hiding all of them, including her schizophrenic twin, Anna, under her roof, and now, as the streets of Budapest thrum with the pounding boots of Nazi soldiers, they are all at risk.

It is time to run.

Then Ilona and her husband betray them by taking the only two tickets to safety for themselves, abandoning Natalie to shelter Anna and Mila from the encroaching horror alone. As the danger seeps ever nearer to her door, Natalie is forced to reach down into the core of her faith to believe in what she must and save what she can, no matter what the sacrifice.

An inspirational story of faith and family, strength and weakness, and the ultimate victory of love over hate, Mrs. Tuesday’s Departure shows the power faith has to light even the most imposing darkness.

So, which is it going to be???

Please leave a comment below and let me know your favorite.

I can't wait to see the results!

What Are Your Twenty Wishes?

2011-08-31T12:17:00.000-04:00

I've been reading Twenty Wishes by Debbie Macomber. Originally, I checked this book out from the library for Mom, who has become an avid reader since we moved to Evergreen. However, after she raved about how much she enjoyed the novel, I decided to read it before returning it to the library.

"A gentle and uplifting story . . . It's impossible not to cheer for Macomber's characters, and there's a story in this book for a woman of every age. When it comes to creating a special place and memorable, honorable characters, nobody does it better than Macomber." —Book Page

Ironically, I became a fan of Debbie Macomber not from reading her extensive fiction collection, but from a non-fiction book she wrote in 2007 called Knit Together: Discover God's Pattern for Your Life. In this inspiring book, Debbie outlines her long journey to becoming a published author, how it took writing seven books over the course of five years before she was finally published. Now more than 70 million of her books have been published and she continues to write new ones each year, most recently focusing on her Blossom Street and Cedar Cove series.

What really resonated with me in Knit Together, and which she touches upon again in Twenty Wishes, was her belief in the power of setting goals, and writing down those goals as a means to focus our attention on their attainment.

Which, of course, got me thinking...what would my twenty wishes be? Sure the first few are easy: job, house. But after that? That's where the fun comes in as I dig deeper into the secret dreams and desires I've buried deep inside. So this weekend I'm going to work on that list and see where it leads.

Now it's you're turn. Do you think you could come up with a list of twenty wishes? In Twenty Wishes, Anne Marie the main character, goes so far as creating a scrapbook that dedicates a page to illustrating each of her twenty wishes. Do you think it would make a difference if you wrote out your wishes?

Giving What You Have

2011-08-24T12:15:00.000-04:00

When I was gainfully employed I got into the habit of tithing, or giving ten percent of what I earned. It made me feel good to share what I'd earned and I enjoyed directing money to charities that I believed in. Over the past year, when I've been looking for work rather than earning I haven't been able to give as much since I'm not earning a significant income (or some months, nothing at all).

However, thanks to the example of my mother, I've learned that giving can achieved in other ways. For instance, Mom volunteers for two hours each Tuesday at our local thrift store and two hours at the Senior Resource Center. Lately, she's gotten into the habit of bringing a special treat with her, usually something I've baked, to share with the ladies at the Senior Resource Center.

This morning when I dropped her off, I watched her walk up the pathway to the entrance with a package of brownies that I'd made the day before. She stopped to speak with two ladies who attended the daily 'senior daycare' at the center. After a moment, she handed one of the ladies one of the packages of browies she was carrying, she touched the woman's cheek, and then continued on her way.

Now I know two things:

1) those brownies were intended for someone else, but there must have been something said that inspired Mom to give them to that particular woman.

2) Mom wasn't feeling 100% this morning, her legs are weak, which means it's difficult for her to walk.

And here's what I learned:

Giving comes in all forms and these random acts of kindness can have just as great an impact as all the money I used to give away. I think I need to find more ways to give back, and I believe my mother's example has provided some wonderful inspiration.

How to Get Un-Stuck

2011-08-17T12:13:00.000-04:00

In the comments section of my last post, my friend and fellow blogger, Larramie, asked how my brother John changed my mind about choosing this house. I thought I'd share that process with you because it taught me an important lesson about getting unstuck.

I first saw this house, my new house, back in September. I rejected it because I thought the ceilings were too low compared to the very high ceilings of the house I was renting at the time. However, I also sent my brother John an email brochure of the property since he was interested in our house hunt. He immediately liked the house and encouraged me to give it further consideration. So over the following months of October and November I went back to the house about five times, each time convincing myself that this was not the house for me. In particular, I didn't like the small room off of the living room that was being used as a dining area, because of its low sloping ceiling.

By mid-November, John was calling almost daily for house hunting updates, since the landlord of the house we were renting had informed us that he was going to move back into the house by mid-December, which meant that we needed somewhere to move. Finally, John suggested that he come out to Evergreen from Tampa for a couple days to look at the house with me. I accepted his offer, certain that if he saw the house in person he would see things my way (John and I have a looong history of sibling rivalry that makes Cain and Abel look like Laurel and Hardy).

So on a Sunday morning in late-November, the week before Thanksgiving and three weeks before we had to move from our former home, John flew into Denver and I drove him straight to the house. After he looked around for ten minutes, he sat down on the steps and said, "I don't want to influence you, but I'd buy this house." He then proceeded to go through my list of objections one by one and offered actual solutions that would fix the problems (Don't like a sloping ceiling? Build a gabled roof! Don't like the master bath? Put in those pebbled floors you've always dreamed of!). Did I mention that John is also a building contractor with a great deal of experience with home remodels?

Suddenly, instead of seeing that house as a source of frustration, I was giddy with ideas to create a place I would really love. Yes, it will take time and money...and it may be years before I am able to accomplish everything. But instead of frustration, I have new projects to dream and plan! Suddenly, something clicked in my mind and I was able to shift my perspective and see the house differently. Instead of focusing on its perceived faults, I was able to see its real beauty. That's probably why I feel so at home here now.

Two days later, as I was driving John to the airport for his flight home, I received the call that my offer on the house had been accepted. Which is why I was able to write that cryptic post in November, thanking John for his help with that 'un-named' project.

While on one level, this is a post about what a great brother I have (and I do) and how my family offered wonderful advice and support during a very stressful time (which they did, thank you Kathy!).... it's also a post about how to get unstuck.

It occurred to me that at times we can get so enamored of our opinion, of our need to be right, that we can become mired in a situation, when simply shifting our perspective would allow us to move forward. After the dust had settled, I asked John how he had known what to say to me. He said that he listened to my objections to the house as he would listen to a client. Then, when he saw the house in person, he was able to counter my 'feelings' about the house with concrete solutions. Luckily, because I respect my brother's superior knowledge of houses, I was able to allow myself to look at things differently and thus move forward, from a limited belief to excitement about new possibilities. The irony is that of course the house hadn't changed a bit in the two months I'd been looking at it, only my perspective.

So that's my most important lesson...When I face what seems like an insurmountable problem, or when I feel myself getting stuck by one view of a situation, I will remember that if I am willing to open my mind, the solution will appear from another perspective.

As to that dining area that caused me such frustration? Until some future day when I raise the roofline, I've redefined the space, from dining area to 'reading room,' and it's now one of my favorite places in the house.

Do We Ever Really Grow Up

2011-08-10T12:09:00.000-04:00

I've been unpacking the last of the boxes that were in storage in Florida and today I came across one that was filled with pictures taken ten years ago. The pictures actually made me laugh as I looked at myself posed in front of the Duomo in Florence, Italy, looking so earnest and trying so hard to appear fashionable because I’d recently lost fifty pounds and thought the new skinny me in my new wardrobe would be my key to happiness. And it was in some respects, I had a great time. Yet it was still the same old me inside, with all of the same old insecurities.

As I looked at those pictures, I wondered: do we ever grow up? Do we ever really change over the years?

I guess the reason this is on my mind is because I just turned 49, which is one of those momentous numbers. It means that for the next 364 days, I will be obsessing about turning 50, which seems so much older than my forties ever did.

When I was younger I always looked to the future and thought of the things I would accomplish and how different I would be at some future date. Like when I ‘grew up’. As I looked at those pictures of me, then considered the row of journals that sit on my bookshelf spanning the course of twenty five years of my life, and as I unpacked that beautiful white lingerie that I bought fifteen years ago to wear on the wedding night that never happened (It's a stunning white silk gown and robe with sleeves trimmed with white boa feathers.) I realized that really, despite all the milestones that come with age, we don’t actually change the core of who we are. Like, when I run into college friends on Facebook, no matter how I think I’ve changed, to them I'm still the goofy girl I was back in university.

When I lived in New York and worked on Wall Street, I imagined the pinnacle of my life would be when I turned 45 and I pictured myself riding to the office each morning in the back of a limousine, wearing a full-length mink. Today, that would be my idea of Hell. Well, maybe I’d still take the full-length fur in all of its inappropriate glory, but I’d wear it with with a pair of jeans and the beautiful black cowboy boots I bought in the men’s department of our local thrift store.

I never became that woman I thought I wanted to be. Instead, I did something completely different. While I have finally realized many of the things I hoped for and still fallen short on others that remain elusive, what I find the most disconcerting is that inside, I am still the uncertain young girl I thought I'd eventually outgrow. I always thought that with time and accomplishing my goals, all those fears and insecurities would somehow melt away and with age I would become more confident. But I haven’t evolved into something different than I was back then. I’m still Suzanne, with all my over blown self-doubt, my fear that no one likes me, that I’ll always fall short no matter how hard I try, that I am neither talented nor feminine enough to be the popular girl. And I wonder what's the point of the journey if we can never escape that person we wanted to change: no matter how much we accomplish or how far we travel from where we first began?

And then….

Just when I think I’ve found a great truth, and decided that the best course is to simply aim a little lower, I instead discover something that turns my conclusion on its head.

Recently my mother has begun to cook, something she never exhibited the patience or interest in for the first eighty-three years of her life. Then this past weekend she picked up my old battered copy of Julia Child’s Mastering the Art of French Cooking and decided she was going to try a few recipes. And she, who has been willingly displaced from her home like Naomi from the Biblical book of Ruth, who chugs along on a heart that operates at fifty percent of its capacity, has created a new life for herself here and found a grace and contentment that she never had before. What she seems to know instinctively (she's always been a woman of action, rather than the self-absorbed navel gazing that I excel in) is how to make the most of where you are geographically and spiritually. And as a result, her life is much richer.

While I toss and turn at night, wracked with insomnia over my worries about the friends who won't come to dinner, the snow that didn't fall in Evergreen, the book that I will rewrite again though it’s already ten years in the making, she has found peace in who she is now. While I still doubt that I will ever grow up or become the person I thought I'd be, I hope that I will eventually know her contentment with who I've always been.

List-Making

2011-08-04T00:04:00.000-04:00

I've written a lot about productivity lately because it's something I've struggled with and because I know how much better I feel when I've actually gotten work done.

Today was a wonderful example. Before I got up this morning, I made a mental list of the most important things I wanted to work on today. Then I started with the item that offered the biggest pay-off in feelings of accomplishment. For me, this would be to spend an hour editing my second novel MAP.

Funny enough, two hours later I finally got up from my desk with a wonderful sense of satisfaction. Not only had I doubled the amount of time I'd set out to work on my new project, I got further along than I thought and now have a much better sense of the novel in its entirety. Best of all, I can't wait to get back to it tomorrow.

This positive feeling provided me with the energy to tackle some less glamorous tasks for the rest of the afternoon, such as vacuuming and mopping, clearing out a planter in the front of the house, and taking the dogs for a mile walk.

Now I'm looking forward to the rest of the week!

Overcoming Procrastination with Spreadsheets

2011-07-27T11:59:00.000-04:00

WEEK OF 6/6	WALK	MAP	READ	BLOG	MARKETING	JOURNAL
MONDAY
TUESDAY
WEDNESDAY
THURSDAY
FRIDAY
WEEK OF 6/13	WALK	MAP	READ	BLOG	MARKETING	JOURNAL
MONDAY
TUESDAY
WEDNESDAY
THURSDAY
FRIDAY

As I've documented in many, many posts, I have more clever ways to procrastinate than just about anyone. Which means that if I want to get anything done, consistently, I need to figure out a way to hold myself accountable.

Which is when I came up with this Excel spreadsheet.

Yes, it's crude and lacking both in sophistication and beauty. But it gets the job done. Since I began using it last month, my productivity has increased in every area. And when I slack off, I can see where and how long it's lasted.

Creating the spreadsheet was simple. On one axis I listed the days of the week. On the other, I listed the activities that currently meant the most to me, things that would improve my life if practiced consistently. These included: exercise, writing, and reading. Each day, as I spend time on a different task, I color in that activity.

As you can see, last week I did a better job of working on MAP than this week. On the other hand, I've gotten more exercise in this week. Either way, the spreadsheet is a convenient way for me to hold myself accountable and to see, over time, where I spend my time and where I need to focus if I want to meet my goals.

How do you keep track of your progress on important projects?

The 15 Minute Challenge

2011-04-23T11:24:00.003-04:00

Last month I was inspired by a post I read on Keetha's new blog for writers You are Talented and Original. (By the way, I just love that title.) But back to the subject at hand...on Keetha's new blog she'dlinked to an article about a writer who challenged herself to write just 15 minutes each day for a month and at the end to record what happened.

After I read the article I left a comment on Keetha's post that I'd been so inspired that I wanted to try the same challenge. In my case I wanted to use the challenge as a means to jumpstart my journal again, which had like everything else in my life, fallen to the wayside with the move and unpacking that seemed to begin in December and roll into the end of February.

On the first day of Lent, instead of giving something up (I'd already given up smoking in February, I figured that was enough) I decided to pick something up, in my case, a pen. As we now move into Easter week and the final days of Lent I want to report on my progress, what I've discovered, and how I will use this technique going forward.

While it seems a simple thing to write every day for ONLY 15 minutes, the actual commitment is much more difficult. I experimented with writing in the morning, in the evening, carrying my journal around with me in my purse, or putting it on my nightstand. What I found is that once I picked up the pen completing the fifteen minutes of writing wasn't difficult, but picking up the pen was. In other words, even though my journal shouldn't be the least bit intimidating because I'm the only one who will ever read those words, more often than not I made excuses not to begin writing. I would reason that I had nothing to say, or too much to say and not enough time. In the end, days would sometimes go by without writing a word. Over the course of the forty days of Lent I averaged a journal entry every three days, although there were a couple times when I went a week without writing at all.

Although the original impetus of this challenge was to get back to journalling, my larger goal was, in a roundabout way, to find the means to begin my next project: editing A Map of Heaven, a book that has been 'resting' for several years. I'd hoped to apply the fifteen minute challenge to the editing process. I did dig out two of the numerous drafts of MAP and found one draft on my hard drive that oddly seems to be completely different than the two earlier printed drafts.

What I've learned from the 15 minute challenge is that I want to continue it. Even though I was successful in writing every day, this experience did reawaken how much I enjoy journalling and want make it part of my daily life, as well as the internal stumbling stones that keep me from achieving that goal. I've also discovered that I want to use this experience to learn about the limits of my self-discipline when it comes to novel writing and how I can improve upon my consistency. Specifically, I want to apply consistency to editing my novel and realize that much can be accomplished in just fifteen minutes a day if applied every day.

Best of all, this 15 minute challenge could be applied in a myriad of ways. For instance, since quitting smoking I've gained ten pounds on top of an already chunky monkey frame. What if I decided to go for a brisk walk each day for 15 minutes? Or how about those great books that we all pledge to read? Fifteen minutes a day would eventually knock down even Charles Dickens' Great Expectations or Tolstoy'sWar and Peace.

So I want to challenge you: what can you accomplish in just 15 minutes a day, every day? Try it for a month and let me know how it goes. I'd love to compare results.

Oh Lord, where is my job?

2010-07-07T12:29:00.004-04:00

photo credit: http://www.phocabulary.com/precipice

Two weeks ago I posted my resume to a dozen of the most popular job sites to see if by casting a wide net I would attract more activity for my job hunt.

The results were simultaneously interesting and disappointing. On the one hand, I did not receive one inquiry from an employer. Which is of course, disappointing since most of these sites tout their ability to get your resume in front of recruiters and employers and often reference the number of people who get hired each week by using their site.

On the other hand, what I did get was email from three 'career management' firms. Each one offered to critique my resume, re-write it, write cover letters, and put me in touch with the thousands of 'unpublished' job listings, all for $2000 - $7000.

While I declined their offers, I did have a very informative conversation with one of the career management recruiters which helped me to clarify the message I was trying to convey in my resume. Our conversation actually lasted over an hour and a half and was very helpful. So although I won't be using her firm for my job campaign, I am very grateful for her help.

Using the information that I gathered from that conversation, I re-crafted my resume and yesterday, re-posted it to the same job sites. I've also increased the number of job alerts that I receive by email each day, so that I will have even more jobs to apply to.

Which brings me to another aspect of the job hunt. On a daily basis I apply to several jobs, both permanent and contract/temporary work. Most of the time, I get no reply to my resume. Once in a while I receive a form letter of the sort: 'you're very qualified, but we've found someone who more closely matches our requirements...'. And I file these in my 'Employment' file.

However, what is very discouraging is when I apply to a job that I would love, and that I know I would excel at...and then receive the dreaded form letter. That happened to me on Monday.

Over the weekend, I applied to a job that I was so impressed with, that after I'd sent in my application, I actually held imaginary interviews with the prospective employer. On Monday, however, I received a generic form letter with the requisite ding. And this time it hurt, because it was a job I know I would have been perfect for. What was worse was that there was no way to reply to the employer to state my case, or ask for re-consideration.

And that's what is so frustrating about this whole job hunt. I desperately want to get to work and to feel productive. I'm writing more on my blogs simply as means to feel productive at something. But blogging doesn't pay the bills. I need a job to do that. Hopefully a job that I love, that actually aligns with my interests and talents.

A year ago, I was at a Fourth of July party in Fort Lauderdale. I was introduced to a friend of a friend, who said that he was a pilot. He loved his work. My problem is that when I am introduced, I don't know what to say. 'Hi, I'm Suzanne, I'm a ....'. And that's the bottom line. I'm tired of standing on the precipice of beginning. I want to get underway, I just don't know how.

By the way, here's my revised resume. For what it's worth.

Suzanne E. Anderson, MBA

Self-initiated Influencer and Energetic Team Player: Operate as part of a close-knit team, with a commitment to client satisfaction. Inspire others to top performance. Experience developing and managing deadlines, working on multiple projects simultaneously as project leader and team member. Demonstrate positive initiative, leadership and comfort working in a fast paced environment.

Proven Record – Across All Corporate Functions: Strong interpersonal collaboration and team skills including working with cross-functional teams. Coordinate with all levels of the organization including executive management. Confident in high-pressure environment and able to operate successfully in senior level meetings.

International Liaison: Valuable international experience building relationships to create seamless communications and coordinate activities between competing departments on different continents.

Entrepreneurial Experience: Extensive experience working with entrepreneurs to assess, develop and achieve business and marketing goals. Founded start-up freelance writing business. Possess excellent relationship and new business development skills and desire to consistently achieve top revenue results.

Superior Problem Solving and Communication Skills: Translate complex information into clear and concise communications that will resonate with key audiences. Possess excellent written communication, verbal communication, and interpersonal skills. Excellent organizational and project-management skills. Exceptional presentation skills.

Selected Achievements and Skills

· Effectively communicating and collaborating with all levels of staff to ensure optimum environment. Exemplary interpersonal style, bringing a positive, problem-solving oriented approach to education.

· Energetic and forward thinking, ability to quickly learn and analyze complex content. Enjoy intellectual challenge; remain engaged and curious until solution is achieved.

· Position Company in the marketplace as a highly competitive solutions based investment firm. Maintain an in-depth knowledge of financial products.

· Engage with entrepreneurs and Fortune 500 clients, analyze business requirements, conduct research and create solutions, driven to provide exceptional results.

· Served on key committees for curriculum writing and development, with online interactive learning experience. Combine strong passion for literacy, motivation, and inspiration to create a fun and challenging learning environment with strong connections to local and ex-patriot community.

ENTREPRENEURIAL AND FORTUNE 500 EXPERIENCE

AndersonWrites – Corporate Communications, Technical Writer

· Demonstrate excellence in writing, analysis, and instructional design skills with the ability to write in a variety of styles/voices as needed – including sensitivity to requirements of narrated content.

· Prioritize and coordinate multiple writing assignments, including research and follow-up. Create innovative marketing messages that drive revenue and bring unique product “stories” to the community. Conceptual thinker. Source of ideas that work.

· Write articles for More.com, a women’s magazine website. Utilize social media outlets including blogs, Twitter, and Facebook to promote marketing objectives.

NAI Rauch Weaver Norfleet Kurtz & Co. – Commercial Real Estate Sales and Leasing

· Utilize a consultative approach to assess and provide solutions and programs that meet the entrepreneurs and investors’ strategic needs. Instincts for what will sell

· Conduct market research, evaluate acquisition targets, and negotiate contract terms. Make forceful group presentations

· Design and manage marketing campaigns for listed properties. Continually assess and evaluate marketing initiatives and methods with team ensuring resources are utilized in the most effective manner.

Baku International School – Educator

· Create innovative and effective lesson plans and ownership based projects. Bring out creativity in others. Excellent trainer.

· Liaison with Senior Management, and international community, including government interests, to create and manage innovative extra-curricular and overseas educational programs.

· Founder and publisher of school’s Literary Journal. Editor and coordinator of English language program for local children’s educational newspaper.

· Freelance editor for foreign publisher. Read and review manuscripts outstanding oral and written communication skills. Coordinator and editor of school’s accreditation report.

Yamaichi International America – Assistant Vice President Corporate Finance

· Deliver in depth presentations to internal and external clients across distribution channels. Provide a comprehensive representation of philosophy, principles, processes, strategies and performance; articulate and discuss various market and investment related issues as appropriate. Assist blue chip/Fortune 500 companies access international capital markets and their Japanese subsidiaries through the IPO process.

· Serve as a stand in for senior management in client and marketing meetings. Liaison with Sales and Trading colleagues to foster the development of appropriate investment product related materials and updates.

· Manage Investor Relations products for U .S. companies to reach Japanese investors. Conceptualize, develop and execute creative marketing materials for the institutional market.

CORE COMPETENCIES

Strong management and motivational skills * Self-motivated* Corporate Communications * Willing to try new approaches * Relationship Management * Exceptional team player * Training and Development* Corporate Liaison * Persistent* Microsoft Office Suite * New Business Development * International Liaison * Very positive / upbeat* Customer Relations & Service * Sense of humor * Product Presentations * New Product Launch * Overseas Experience * Cross-functional Management Responsibilities * Achieve Editorial, Budgetary, and Schedule Goals * Risk taker * Edit manuscripts * Attention to detail, analytical mindset * Work independently * Cross-Industry Expertise * Strong organizational skills * Simplify complex problems

FORMAL EDUCATION

Nova Southeastern University

· MBA - Masters of Business Administration GPA 3.9 /4.0

· Dual Majors: Entrepreneurship, Real Estate and Development, Minor: Finance

University of Michigan

· BGS - Bachelors of General Studies - International Business GPA 3.0/4.0

· Full Athletic Swimming Scholarship, Crisis Line Peer Counselor

15 June 2010 - What do you think of job boards?

2010-06-14T18:06:00.000-04:00

Another month, another update.

Actually most of the month of May was spent in a desperate race against time as I scrambled to find a new rental home before my lease ran out at the end of the month.

Thanks to a lot of hunting and a whole lot of prayer, a terrific house became available literally in the last week of May. I then spent the following week moving and finally, I'm settled in....for now, or hopefully, for good.

Now that I have an office set up in a spare office, I'm back on the job hunt with renewed energy and focus. I spent last week updating my resume and applying for jobs.

I've begun this week by spending the day applying to the Top 20 Job Search Engines, according to PC Magazine. Here's the dirty dozen that I've posted my resume with:

Beyond.com
Exusearch
jobcentral.com
jobserve.com
jobster.com
monster.com
simplyhired.com
talentexchange.com
trovix.com
usajobs.com
hotjobs.com

Tomorrow, I'll go back and start combing through the job listings on each site and apply to specific jobs.

My question to you is: do you think job sites work? What's been your experience using or posting your resume on these or other job sites?

12 May 2010

2010-05-12T21:10:00.000-04:00

It's been a month and a half since I've updated this blog....which is not to say that I've been idle. In fact, I've completed six freelance writing assignments and have another one waiting in the wings. I've also been actively applying to regular jobs, just today I applied to 7 jobs. And by the looks of my 'work' folder in my email account, I've applied to about 150 jobs since I've been here. Which is either laudable or pitiful. Perhaps both.

I'm also actively looking for a new home....my lease is up at the end of this month and so far, I have no idea of where I will lay my head on June 1st.

Fingers crossed.

WWHSD?

2010-04-01T16:15:00.000-04:00

"Good morning, Pooh Bear," said Eeyore gloomily. "If it is a good morning," he said. "Which I doubt," said he.

"Why, what's the matter?"

"Nothing, Pooh Bear, nothing. We can't all, and some of us don't. That's all there is to it."

"Can't all what?" said Pooh, rubbing his nose.

"Gaiety. Song-and-dance. Here we go round the mulberry bush."

- Image and quote thanks to Winnie-Pooh.org

Remember when WWJD was all the rage? Every kid on the block had a colorful rubber bracelet with those initials, which stood for: What Would Jesus Do?, a potent reminder to consider what the Savior would do if He were in a similar situation. I like to imagine that this slogan was meant to inspire us to act in a manner that would be pleasing to God, but it might also be a reminder for us to act in a way that was consistent with our best selves, if we are indeed children of God.

A few weeks ago, when I was feeling like rather Eeyeore-ish and discouraged by the glacial progress of the job hunt (why does no one want to hire me?), novel writing (does this story even have a plot?), home search (is it Evergreen or somewhere else?) I had an epiphany.

For a brief moment I imagined an idealized version of myself living the life I wanted, where everything had fallen perfectly into place, where instead of feeling discouraged I felt confident, where instead of being turned down for a job I was doing my perfect career, where instead of wondering where to live I knew exactly where to go. I savored that happy image and then I thought, what if every morning I got up and asked, "What Would Happy Suzanne Do?" And then I thought of specific tasks for each day that I would accomplish with a positive attitude, not worrying about the outcome, simply getting the work done with a the best intent. Instead of seeing a rejection as another indication that I (Eeyore) am a loser, I would ask 'what can I learn from this, how can I improve my performance next time?' For example, when a proposal I'd made on elance.com was rejected, instead of telling myself that this was a sure indication that I would never get hired, I said to myself, well there were other people who were also rejected, and the person who was hired bid less than I did, or maybe they wrote a better proposal. So, next time I will improve my proposal and bid lower if I want.

I know, I know, this sounds like some feel good, 'I'm okay, you're okay' pap. But it turns out that there is scientific evidence for the benefits of using learned optimism to improve our outlook and therefore our performance and enjoyment of life. Last week while perusing the shelves at the thrift store, I picked up a copy of Dr. Susan Vaughan's book Half Empty, Half Full: Understanding the Psychological Roots of Optimism. In it she describes how our internal predisposition to pessimism or optimism colors the our perception of external events, like success or failure. Based on studies with laboratory rats and examples from human case studies, she demonstrates that people who have a pessimistic outlook believe that failures are their fault and are destined to be perpetuated and success is discounted as a fluke. Whereas optimists see failure as external to themselves (and their positive self image) as temporary, and something to be overcome the next time and success is expected. Dr. Vaughan believes that these positive or negative outlooks become hardwired in the limbic areas of our brains, but through sustained positive thinking practice can be changed. This book was originally published in 2000 and since then several other books in the theme of 'positive psychology' or the 'science of happiness' have been published, offering hope that as we change the way we perceive the world, our actions, and therefore our outcomes will have more positive results.

From a practical standpoint this makes sense: if you are pessimistic, you're more likely to give up sooner, believing you are destined to fail. On the other hand, if you are an optimist, you see yourself as a winner and therefore are more likely to stay with a task and modify your approach until you find a way to succeed, because you believe that that outcome is as inevitable as the pessimist believes his failure. In other words, "As you think, shall you become" a quote attributed to Bruce Lee (though I think there's a similar quote in the Bible book of Proverbs).

I have made WWHSD my mantra. Although I've always considered myself an optimist, I also realized that my core sense of self carried negative expectations to every endeavor. And quite frankly I was tired of that burden. While I will always adore Eeyore, I've decided that I want to change my outlook on life. It hasn't been easy, just this morning in bed I started to cry as I wallowed in some negative thought. Rathe than stay there and sink deeper into brooding, I got out of bed and got to work. And I immediately felt better.

Wishing you all a Happy Easter, remembering the sacrifice of Christ for our sins, and His resurrection that speaks to the new life that we can all embrace.

31 March 2010

2010-04-01T00:08:00.000-04:00

Applied for 13 jobs
signed up for three new job alerts
1 elance interview
Applied for 2 new elance jobs

29 March 2010

2010-03-30T22:53:00.001-04:00

Reached 60,000 words in my novel in progress
Restored document files to my netbook

28 March 2010

2010-03-30T22:49:00.001-04:00

Applied for 2 freelance jobs
Recommended a friend for a job

25 March 2010

2010-03-25T22:46:00.001-04:00

Applied for 3 jobs
Applied for 5 freelance jobs
Took care of Mom's taxes

23 March 2010

2010-03-23T21:34:00.003-04:00

applied for 5 freelance jobs, worked on pitch
discovered new job site, signed up for email alerts
applied for three new jobs at a corporate site
had inspiration for a new scene in novel, wrote the intro scene, I am now re-energized about my novel
it's snowing, beautiful!

22 March 2010

2010-03-22T21:32:00.001-04:00

wrote 1,000 words in my work in progress
applied for five freelance assignments
walked for an hour

13 March 2010

2010-03-13T21:31:00.000-05:00

applied to six freelance assignments

12 March 2010

2010-03-12T21:30:00.000-05:00

completed elance feedback
applied to 5 jobs
wrote 3 pages in my journal
applied to 5 freelance assignments

10 March 2010

2010-03-10T21:28:00.000-05:00

updated my resume on ## 's job board
applied for a writers conference scholarship
updated proposal on elance
applied to copywriting job
applied to 3 jobs on ##'s corporate website

25 February 2010

2010-02-25T23:30:00.002-05:00

Excellent day. Went for a walk first thing this morning with Coco. Met one of my neighbors at the end of the road and actually engaged in conversation, not bad for not yet having coffee. It was sunny, though there were enough clouds to remind me that we were due to have snow this afternoon. The dirt road was snow covered but thankfully not slick. Coco seemed to enjoy the walk as much as I did as she ran along the side of the road sniffing what I'm sure were the scents of not other dogs, but other animals that make their home in the woods that separate each home in this area.

I spent most of the day applying for corporate jobs and freelance writing jobs. FIve of each. The best part was that these were jobs that I would enjoy, both on the corporate side and the freelancing. I even went through the Ladders website to send out my resume to 20 of their recruiters. Today I finally managed to do what I've imagined, to dig deeper in the job hunt and pursue more meaningful contacts.

This evening I went to work on my novel and wrote another two pages. I'd love to reach 60,000 words by the end of the month or by the end of next week. Tomorrw, I'm going to switch it up and write in the morning.

Still to do: Push ups, sit ups, make progress in my book club selection.

24 February 2010

2010-02-25T00:31:00.001-05:00

Took Mom to the airport this morning. Spoke with her this evening, she's safely back home in Fort Lauderdale and already missing me and the beauty of Evergreen. The house is a lot quieter without her here, but I hope she will enjoy the next six weeks with her friends. Then she'll fly back here and then off to Hawaii for a month to celebrate her friend's 90th birthday. Not bad for 84!

Can I match that energy? Let's see how much I can get done in the next six weeks. Today, two pages written in my novel. Twenty five sit ups. Ten push ups.

22 February 2010

2010-02-22T22:46:00.000-05:00

After a rather depressing blog post I wrote yesterday over at Suzanne Anderson, today was a better day. I got up and got to work at my computer first thing. I started with pursuing jobs at elance.com, I applied for seven new assignments. I believe now that bidding on jobs, composing proposals for the work, is a learning process, so rather than get discouraged if I get rejected, I will now consider that I am simply learning what to do better next time and one step closer to acceptance.

Second, I am staying with my commitment to the writing schedule I made for myself at the beginning of the year and have written a minimum of one page in my novel today. It's taking longer to write one page than it did to write two yesterday simply because I'm moving into new territory, unplotted, and the place in the novel for more suspense, something has to happen that will propel the action for the next few chapters, but I'm not sure what yet.

21 February 2010

2010-02-21T21:31:00.000-05:00

Today I wrote another 1,000 words / 4 pages in my WIP. I'm gathering momentum and really enjoying the writing process of this novel. I'm also looking forward to seeing where the story takes me, 55,000 words done, on to my target 100,000 word finish line.

18 February 2010

2010-02-18T23:44:00.000-05:00

Today was a productive day. I wrote 1000 words / 4 pages in my novel and applied to 5 jobs on elance.com. Now I'm going to read The Historian, a 650 page novel that we chose for our first book in my new book club. The only problem is that I'm only on page 175....hence the need to turn off the computer and open the book!

15 February 2010

2010-02-15T22:32:00.005-05:00

Yesterday was quite a day. My computer died. This is the third computer that has died in the past year. Either I'm spending way too much time on the computer or I've just had a run of bad computer karma. First my Dell laptop died after 2 1/2 years of good service while I was doing my MBA. Then my HP laptop died within a couple short months of ownership. I got the hard drive replaced and gave it to my nephew as a going off to college present. I then bought a Toshiba netbook which I loaded up with Norton 360 and McAfee anti-virus software because in each of the previous computer failures, my hard drive died and the thought was that perhaps it was due to a virus.

Being very careful not to open any videos or strange websites and with the addition of the security software, I thought I was safe. Apparently not. The Toshiba is still under warranty so they will replace the hard drive, but sending it off means that I would be without my computer for a few weeks, as well as losing everything on my old hard drive.

A couple positives came out of this adventure. My files had been backed up on Norton's storage area online. I spent last night working with their technical service department to get them restored to the computer I bought yesterday at Wal-Mart. Luckily, I'd previously added a monitor and keyboard to my netbook to accomodate my poor eyesite and big paws, so all I had to replace was an inexpensive tower. I'd also backed up all of my photos to Picasa, google's free photo storage area, as well as storing my documents on a thumb drive I keep in my desk. The other positive was that this event forced me to finally go to the public library where I was able to do a little research, and yes, confirmed the good advice of my blogging friends regarding the 'mystery question' from last week.

Last night when I went to bed exhausted, I was also grateful. I counted the days events with gratitude that everything worked out well in the end despite my initial frustrations. And while the assistance the tech support guy offered didn't succeed in downloading my files properly, this evening I figured out how to do it myself and my files are now safely back on my desktop.

I'm also thinking of switching to an Apple.

12 February 2010

2010-02-12T19:21:00.003-05:00

After my first month in Evergreen, I realized that I was lonely and needed to do something to meet new friends. That need became the impetus to create a book club via the innovative services provided by meetup.com Not only did I have eight book and wine loving people show up at the first meeting, through another group I joined on meetup.com I met a new walking buddy. Lessons learned: 1) if you want something in your life, take action: intention + action = results, 2) the Internet is truly a wonderful resource for accomplishing #1.

After two months of applying for jobs without results, my ego was bruised and I wanted a way to take control of my productivity. While reading an article in Entrepreneur magazine last week, I came across a mention of elance.com, a website which creates a marketplace for freelancers and those seeking their services, to meet and create. So, today I hung out my shingle.

While I will continue to apply for 'traditional' corporate jobs, I am excited to also begin an entrepreneurial endeavor that will allow me to expand my career horizons, work at becoming better at something I love (writing) and feel productive again. I even created a free logo at vistaprints.com (which you can see above) because I like to dream big!

I still worry about the 'what will I do when my lease runs out at the end of May' scenario. Yes, it would certainly make my life easier if I had a great paying, regular job by then and even a house picked out to buy. If I don't I'll have to make some hard decisions. I am grateful, however, for the gifts of this period of uncertainty. It has forced me to take risks I wouldn't otherwise have taken and expanded my horizons into areas I only dreamed of. So with the fear, there is an excitement to see where this unexpected path leads.

10 February 2010 and a Mystery Question

2010-02-10T23:50:00.002-05:00

I'm going to be gone all day tomorrow, at the National Jewish Hospital in Denver again with Mom making the rounds of doctors visits. Everything is fine, in fact, we love how thorough they are, we're just doing the follow-up visits to last week's MRI of her heart.

Along with my other 'little' business project, I've been working on my murder mystery. I've begun playing with a new twist in the plot and there is a question that I know at least one of you very smart people out there will know the answer to:

If I wanted to find out how long a local business in a small village had been in business, for instance, or to look up their business license to see whose name was listed there, would I go to the library, the Chamber of Commerce, or the municipal government offices?

Anyone know the answer?

8 February 2010

2010-02-08T22:29:00.003-05:00

Finally a good day. Okay, that's a bit dramatic and not true. I mean, today was a good day, but the 'finally' is a bit too much. There have been other good days here, I'm just too tough on myself to acknowledge them unless they're good on my terms.

Enough with the confessional/definitional, back to the good day. Today I have finally taken a positive step in taking control of my career. A friend of mine (L.) has told me that I'm not allowed to elaborate on projects/interviews/kissing frogs until they come to pass so that I don't jinx the outcome. So, let's just say that I am taking steps which will allow me to work for myself, or at least to dip my toe into the water and see how it goes....

I will still continue my daily job search for more 'traditional' corporate jobs that I can do remotely (read: at home or in Paris, Hvar, Friday Harbor, etc.) but I'm excited to give this a try and see if it generates a little pocket money or a full-fledged financially independent career. Fingers crossed.

7 February 2010

2010-02-07T20:02:00.004-05:00

Brave Suzanne.

A lighthearted aside.

It's snowing in Evergreen today. Ah, finally. Snow. How long has it been? 2 weeks? 4 weeks? Long enough so that the last snowfall has begun to melt and brown patches of tall grass interrupted my normally snow-covered fields. So, yes, today's snowfall however light, made my day.

As to the 'brave Suzanne' headline? Mid-afternoon I decided I had to have Buffalo wings to eat while watching the Super Bowl. So I bundled up and got in the Hummer and drove to the supermarket. I thought, what a brave girl I am to venture out in this snowstorm to get the makings for wings.

ha.

What a Florida girl I am.

As I drove by the lake at the center of town, I looked over to see at least fifty brave souls not letting a light two inches of snow curtail their afternoon of ice skating.

And the supermarket, packed.

Brave Suzanne.

5 February 2010

2010-02-05T17:23:00.011-05:00

Today was spent at Jewish National Hospital down in Denver. Mom had an MRI scheduled as well as visits with two doctors. Everything went well and we'll hear the results of the MRI of her heart next Friday when we drive back down to meet with her cardiologist.

While I sat in the waiting room, I took advantage of the time away from my computer by reading Down to Business: The First 10 Steps to Entrepreneurship for Women. This book provides very practical advice for every step of the start-up, written by Clara Villarosa, who started and ran a very successful business when she was laid off from a high profile bank job at the age of 52. The nuts and bolts of business start-up are interspersed with stories of real women who created businesses both small and large.

While I don't currently have a specific idea that would provide the impetus to start my own business, it's something I'm extremely motivated to try, if I could conceive of a viable business. So, why not be prepared, just in case?

4 February 2010

2010-02-04T22:32:00.001-05:00

The best part of my day is the last part of my day. That is when I finish with the job hunt and allow myself to open the file that contains my novel in progress and as I stare at the blank page, I allow a new part of the story to unfold. I can't explain what a pleasure it is when that mysterious process happens. One minute I am looking at the last sentences of a chapter and wondering where the story needs to go next. And the next moment I am creating that story out of thin air. I don't know where the ideas come from but when the first glimmer of a thread shows itself, I gently grasp it and begin to type and slowly step forward and see where it leads.

That is when time stands still or flies by or loses its shape and form altogether. And when I've finished my writing for the day, I'm really happy. For the first time in all the years that I've been writing, I'm not putting any pressure on myself. I don't care whether this novel is ever published, I'm not telling myself that everything is riding on this book. I'm writing for my own enjoyment, because although it's already 275 pages long, it's only halfway through and it's my first murder mystery, so it's a new genre and a new adventure. All of these reasons make it a pure pleasure.

Since these entries are about my journey to create the perfect career, let me add that the feeling that I have when I'm writing is what I would love to feel when I am in my right career.

3 February 2010

2010-02-04T00:37:00.000-05:00

On Monday, after another day of applying to jobs, I sent an email to Marc Cenedella, President of The Ladders.com, a job hunting website that I subscribe to. In addition to running that site, Marc sends our an email newsletter and runs a blog with job hunting advice.

My decision to send an email to him was completely spontaneous. In fact, what I did was send him a copy of a recent post I wrote after the President's SOTU address in which I lamented the lack of progress I was having with my job hunt and my resulting frustration.

Remarkably, I received a reply from someone at the Ladders within 24 hours, a detailed email full of suggestions on how to better use their website to improve my job search as well as encouragement to contact them with any questions I might have. I also received a follow up email from Marc.

The point of this post is twofold:

1) Sometimes, perhaps more often than not, if we are proactive we achieve amazing results that do indeed help us to move forward in our projects.

2) Customer service is, or should be, a company's most valuable asset. The Ladders showed that my membership and my feedback was valued. That's how you attract and maintain customer loyalty.

29 January 2010

2010-01-29T21:09:00.003-05:00

Today they announced healthy GDP numbers showing a 5.7% growth in the 4th quarter, quickly discounted by news commentators as an indication of inventory replenishment rather than a necessary predictor of job growth. This news seemed to be reflected by the job notice emails in my inbox. There were fewer than usual and I found that in more than one instance, when I clicked on the hyper-link for the job, I was informed that I'd already applied to the job. That was a bit frustrating because I wanted to make more progress in the job hunt and feel that each day not moving forward is a day wasted. So today became a day of housekeeping, going through papers that had accumulated on my desk, writing, and other mundane but necessary tasks that keep our lives in order.

There are a couple jobs that I have (previously) applied to that I seem to be still under consideration for, which if I were given the opportunity, would really enjoy. At the same time, there continues to be in the back of my mind a desire to figure out a career that would enable me to be self-employed. I don't know what that is, or if I am qualified, but it is there (a gently nagging voice) in the back of my mind.

28 January 2010

2010-01-28T15:42:00.001-05:00

Last night the President said that for all the success stories he'd heard about how the economy was turning around he also knew of people who 'sent out resumes every day and got no response'. At that moment I thought he was speaking of me. Before I moved to Evergreen, I truly imagined that as soon as I started sending out resumes in December, I'd have a job. I thought for sure I'd be starting my new career in January. I'd visualized the job I wanted, 'getting the call', even going to work, or better yet, working from my computer at home.

The reality has been quite different. It is now quickly closing on the end of January and I have not received one positive response to the resumes I've sent out, the jobs I've applied to, the online job boards I've joined. What I have received are daily emails from resume writing services, resume distribution services, services that promise to put my resume in the hands of recruiters, or to help me write a cover letter that will land job offers with just 'one magic line' that apparently the other thousands applying for the same job are missing.

The worst thing about the job hunt is the toll is takes on my self-esteem. I have an MBA that I earned with a 3.9 GPA. I've been an Assistant Vice President for a Japanese Investment Bank, I've taught overseas, and worked in Commercial Real Estate, and yet, day after day I wonder if at 47 I am too old to be hired for the jobs I've applied to, or if the diversity of my work background is actually working against me. This morning I woke up at 5am. This is what happens when I've got a lot on mind, I wake hours early and then the flood of worrying thoughts begin. I try to counter them with positive thoughts or prayer, and if that doesn't work, I turn on the morning news and let the white noise cover the chatter in my head.

Last night, my evening devotional read 'let go and let God' and I'm trying to do that. I also got up this morning and applied for more jobs and posted my resume to more job sites. Let's see who produces results first, me or God...

26 January 2010

2010-01-26T18:27:00.002-05:00

I missed Every Day Do On Thing, I missed the single-minded purpose of this blog and felt that it has become an important log of the move and career journey that I started last year. So I am going to continue posting here and then bring the posts over to my other blog as well.

Today I applied for two jobs with an online learning company that creates curriculum for homeschooling parents and kids. The job is curriculum writing and reviewing which is actually something I done in the past when I was teaching overseas. I would love this job. It would enable me to write, to work on educational subjects, and I would be able to do it remotely, which is one of my primary desires.

This past weekend and then again this afternoon, I spent time reading one or two of the career guidance and exploration books I recently picked up: The Purpose of Your Life, and the more career specific The Pathfinder: How to Choose or Change Your Career for a Lifetime of Satisfaction and Success. There are times when I actually feel guilty taking time from my day to work my way through the exercises in the book. However, for the majority of my working life, I have chosen jobs because they were expedient, because they were available, would provide a reliable paycheck or because they were the type of job that I thought I should. I have had some great experiences as a result but I have yet to find the job that is in synch with my passions, that makes me say "this is what I was meant to do with my life". And that is what I want most now....I have felt this way for years but this is the first time that I have taken the time to really pursue the journey in a step by step way.

What makes the journey difficult and makes me second guess myself is the nagging fear of time slipping away or my six month lease being up before I have a job, of the need for a source of income which often makes me think I should simply go for the reliable paycheck instead of the grander vision....because what if I choose wrong or fail? On the other hand, how do I keep that fear from paralyzing me into either inaction, not taking the chance to try for the job I really want or a starting a business on my own, or choosing a convenient job rather than one that I will really love? Even writing about this has been difficult because I hate to admit my own fears and weakness. One of the greatest questions I have is: I admire entrepreneurs so much, and would love to own my own business, and yet I've never tried, I completely doubt my ability....I say to myself, 'oh, you don't have the personality for entrepreneurship'. Is that a correct assessment or how do I get around that fear and move forward?

Only my determination to take action each day will make a difference. Which is one reason that I am making time to work through those books and think about the decisions I make as well as taking real action steps each day.

19 January 2010

2010-01-19T22:55:00.001-05:00

I've moved all of the posts from this blog to my other blog: Suzanne Anderson - Table 1. The reason is twofold: I wanted to make it easier for readers, so that they would have just one place to go rather than two. From my own blogging habits, I know that I prefer to follow a writer on just one blog. Second, I found that especially now that I am working from home, that my thoughts would often overflow from one blog to another, blurring the lines between the two.

I will continue to blog about my job hunt, in fact I've just written a new post on the hunt tonight over at my other blog. And so that blog will now contain both the record of my job hunt/house purchase, as well as my new life in Evergreen, and my usual random essays on whatever piques my interest. My friend Larramie once remarked that my other blog had lost its focus or become rather random....much like my inner and outer life. That remark struck a cord and made me think what I wanted my blog to reflect. I've decided that I want it to reflect me. It will be interesting to see where that journey takes me and how it will be reflected in the shape of the blog from here.

14 January 2010

2010-01-14T14:07:00.001-05:00

I've spent this morning as well as yesterday actively pursuing job leads, applying for jobs directly as well as signing up with various job search agents. Actually today was the most productive day on that front that I've had since I've been here, which is a positive. Remarkably, I actually found and applied to jobs I would really enjoy doing. And then this evening I spent time on my novel in progress. Both of these things felt good.

I've been in Colorado for six weeks and time is flying faster than I imagined. For instance when I signed in today to write a new post on the job hunt project I was amazed to see that it has been a week since my last post, it seems that it was only days. There is so much I want to accomplish, so much I need to accomplish before the end of May. My greatest concern is that I obtain a career before my six months lease here is up. Whether I do or not may determine whether I can or should stay here or move on.

7 January 2010

2010-01-07T21:26:00.002-05:00

I have to admit that I was terribly bored today. I started off with the best of intentions. I got up, ate a quick breakfast and sat down at my computer to begin my job hunt. I did in fact apply to two or three jobs, perhaps only one of which I'd actually enjoy. And then I got up and went outside to shovel the driveway of the snow that had fallen overnight. It was a stunningly beautiful day here in Evergreen. Yes, cold as can be, but a baby blue sky devoid of a single cloud, the blue spruce lining my driveway were dusted with snow, as were the surrounding mountains. See what I mean?

And yet, as I worked away with my shovel (I'd been unable to get the snowblower to start) the only thing I could think of was: I'm bored. In fact, I was so desperately bored that I started praying: 'Dear God, I want to be productive. I believe that you've given me talents and a purpose. Help me to figure out how to put those to productive and profitable use so I can be financially independent and a productive member of society. Amen." Or something along those lines, perhaps not quite so eloquent...I tend to ramble when I pray. But I'd hoped that the repetitive, meditative physicality of shoveling would open my mind to inspiration.

By the end of the driveway the only definitive idea I'd come up with was that I'd like to start a monthly book club as a means to meet people in the community. When I came in from shoveling, I sent my real estate agent an email and told her about the book club idea and asked her if she knew anyone who'd like to join. (I'm torn between wanting to read 'The Help' or cozy mysteries or biographies or women's fiction, see...decisive. not.)

My problem is that I don't know what I want to do for a career. Oh, I can tell you what I don't want: I don't want a corporate job that requires me to wear pantyhose, a business suit, a corporate structure reporting to a boss that I may or may not like, the prison of a set salary with yearly increases determined not by my efforts but by some predetermined percentage. I don't want to work in sales, I hate cold calling. I've done that, and had enough of it. Although to be fair, there is a comforting security in receiving a known monthly salary that can be counted on to pay the bills, the fun of working with others in the group. On the other hand, having worked in commercial real estate for the past three years I know the freedom of making my own hours, but also the insecurity of going months without income while I waited for a deal to close, or to have a deal fall through at the eleventh hour.

But ask me what I want to do and I'm large on generalizations and short on specifics. Last night I was working on Chapter 7 of The Pathfinder (my favorite career finding book so far). In Chapter 7 I was instructed to compile a list of my career 'wants'. Here's the list of my Top 5:

I want to be financially secure and independent, creating automatic sources of income.
I want to work for myself.
I want to work from home, but have an active social life.
I want to be fearless and confident about who I am and what I do for a career.
I want to discover and utilize my natural talents and passions in my workday.
I want to learn how to make money, invest and grow my income.
I want to be successful in my field.
I want to inspire and influence people through my writing.
I want to be able to work from anywhere in the world.

Okay, that was more than five, but you get the idea.

I have a deep longing in my heart to create a career that makes me want to get out of bed in the morning, that makes me feel productive, in the flow, with a knowing that I am doing exactly what I was born to do. The problem is that I have no idea of what that is. And so I pray and I write this daily blog of the journey. And now I need to discover another way to move forward, closer to that goal because what I felt today was not boredom it was a growing desperation to make progress.

6 January 10

2010-01-06T21:19:00.000-05:00

Today I'm trying to get into more of a routine. Get up at a reasonable hour (7am versus 10am) and then spend the first three hours of the day on the job hunt, sending out resumes, responding to new job listings, etc. Next I work in specific blocks of time for the other projects I'm working on: reacquainting myself with my novel, working on the exercises in The Pathfinder, writing a blog post here, tweeting on twitter, visiting other blogs. The impetus is that hopefully some semblance of structure will help me to track my progress and not let time simply fly by with aimless hours of web surfing or God forbid news junking. (It feels like that's what happened in December, though I know it was much more dramatic and activity filled than that.) And most of all some structure will lead to progress and keep the hounds of fear and self-loathing at bay.

5 January 10

2010-01-05T17:45:00.002-05:00

This afternoon, after creating a new post over at my other blog: A View From Table One, I tried a little experiment. I imported all the posts from this blog over there. I've actually been toying with this idea for a few weeks.

When I first created this blog a year ago, it was to record my journey towards a special end, the move out west. With the beginning of the New Year, I decided that I would continue the blog as a means to record the next step of my journey which is the search for a meaningful (and profitable) career. My other blog became a weekly forum of articles for whatever was on my mind at the moment, generally my view on something political, cultural, or personal.

For the first year, this separation worked and kept me focused on the task at hand. Now however, I find that I am referring readers to one blog or the other, which may or may not be convenient for them. From my own reading habits, even if I know that a blogger has two sites, I will generally stick to reading one site over the other unless I have an abundance of time. Which is what led me today to use blogger's very simply export/import function to import all of the blog posts from this blog to my original blog.

Now, tell me what you think: Do you manage more than one blog? Does it make sense to maintain two blogs or does one do the job? As a blog reader, do you follow a blogger's multiple sites?

3 January 10

2010-01-03T21:29:00.002-05:00

This afternoon I was checking out the bestsellers list on amazon.com and was surprised to see The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin ranked at #21! I was familiar with The Happiness Project via Gretchen's blog of the same name, which she started while she was writing the book and to create an ongoing online project not only to promote the book but also to raise awareness about the project.
This reminded me of the recent stellar success of The Pioneer Woman Cooks, a cookbook by the very popular The PioneerWoman blog, Ree Drummond, whose cookbook recently hit #3 on the New York Times bestsellers list. I remember when I first started reading her blog two years ago.

What do these two women have in common? Brilliant success? Yes. But the more profound and daunting lesson for me is that each woman started a project, completed it, and found success in attaining their goal.

As I've been working my way through The Pathfinder, a book on discovering and creating your right career, I've come face to face with the fact that one of my greatest fears is that I will fail, even if I try, even if I complete all the necessary steps, in the end my effort will fall short and I will be no further along the path of success than I am now. So my overwhelming fear of failure, or of failing again at something I care about, is the greatest obstacle I face going forward.

The other painful admission is that both of these women have accomplished something that I have long tried and failed at, which is to become a published author. Quite honestly, I'm not sure if I have the writing talent to ever make that dream a reality, which makes it all the more bittersweet because books are a deep love of mine and there is no career in the world that would bring me greater joy than to be an author. Yet, despite my best efforts over the past 10 years, I have never managed to bring that dream to fruition. I've completed 2 1/2 novels. The half finished novel I last touched a year ago. Today I opened up those files and compiled them into one document. My goal this year is to finish that novel. Quite honestly, I'm not sure that it's good enough to ever be published but I want to see it through to the end and then start another one. The point is that whether I am ever published or not, I will complete this project.

Success is something I have experienced in life, just not recently. Completing this book, finding the right career for this next phase in my life are two important goals for this year. So is buying a house, which will follow from attaining the right career. I am hungry for success and for being in the flow of my life again.

1 Jan 09

2010-01-01T21:22:00.005-05:00

Last year at this time I started this blog as a means to focus my attention on a long held dream to move out west. It took me nearly a year, but by December I had moved to Evergreen, Colorado.Whether this will ultimately be my new hometown remains to be seen and depends on a number of factors including my ability to find or create a career in the area.

While I've taken the first step in realizing the dream that created this blog last year, I still have a long way to go. Which is why I will continue to use this blog to record the next step in my journey, creating a career that inspires me as seminal endeavors in my past have done. As I mentioned in my New Year's post on A View From Table One, the happiest people I know share one thing in common, they LOVE what they do for a living. In my own life, I can site two similar instances when I was in the 'flow' of life and doing what I was meant to do at that moment: when I was a young competitive swimmer, and later, in my early twenties and first went to work on Wall Street.

So this year, my touchstone is CAREER, and my intention is to create a career that utilizes my natural talents and passions, whose pursuit brings me the joy that I've felt in the past. My first step has been reading The Pathfinder, by Nicholas Lore, the founder of the Rockport Institute, one of the foremost career advising firms in the country. I'm also applying to jobs that speak to my heart rather than my business brain. While I don't yet have an actual picture in my mind of what my perfect career will be, I have instead an impression that currently is nothing more than a feeling of me at my best, happy, excited, and brave enough to try out a few dreams. And that feels good. Now I just have to figure out how to bring that to fruition....and get paid for it!

23 December 09

2009-12-23T16:02:00.002-05:00

I apologize that it has been so long since my last post. When I last left off the adventure of my move to Evergreen, Colorado, I was waiting for the delivery of my household belongings from Florida.

Before I chose the shipper for my belongings and the transport of my car, I did extensive research of companies via the Better Business Bureau and several online review sites. I eventually chose Joyce Van Lines because they had an A rating with the BBB and few negative reviews. Unfortunately, all my research did not result in a smooth move. Things started smoothly with the pick up of my boxes, furniture, and car. However, after that there were several issues all of which centered around a lack of communication, which led to feelings of frustration and a sense of being taken advantage of. All of this made me so depressed and frustrated at my inability to do anything that I stopped writing here and on my other blog. Eventually, I was unable to work out an acceptable solution with the company and I made a complaint to the Better Business Bureau and to my credit card company. The following is my side of the story. I'm sure Joyce Van Lines sees things differently.

This is the complaint that I sent to the BBB and to my credit card company. Joyce Van Lines responded by saying that they will not pay for a claim I filed for a broken marble topped table until I retract my complaint.

***********

Joyce Van Lines failed to perform their contracted services for my move from Fort Lauderdale, Florida to Evergreen, Colorado. I was first given an estimate to move 1200 lbs of household goods for $1261. Then when I informed them that I wanted to also transport my car, they said they would move my car in the same van as my shipment for a total of $3000 for goods and car.

1.) When I originally placed the order for service I was told that I could use my American Express card. I was told that they would take my Amex card number, but that no charges would be made to the card until the shipment was delivered. This is consistent with the company policy stated on their website which states that all shipments are COD. Instead they were charged without my knowledge three days after the shipment was picked up. Joyce Van Lines made two unautorized charges to my American Express card. The first was for $3000, which was the original amount contracted for and the second was for $1579, which they claim was for additional furniture, however, I was never informed of the additional amount. They made a second unauthorized charge for extra weight without first informing me of the charge and without providing an official document showing the weight for the total shipment.

2.) As part of the original $3000, $1534 was allocated to move my car inside their moving van. It turns out that it was instead transported by DAS, an outside carrier for $1,030.00 without my knowledge or consent. They also made no attempt to inform me of this fact and I only found out because a DAS key ring was left on my car’s key chain. When I found out, Joyce Van Lines intitially agreed to refund the entire $504 difference and then refused to refund me the difference of $504.00 that I am due since I was overcharged by them for the auto-shipping.

The order for my car to be shipped was placed at the same time that I placed the order for the home furnishings. When the pick up for the car was arranged I was told that the driver was putting it on his truck and it would remain on his truck until it arrived in Evergreen and that all my belongings, which had been picked up days before, would be placed on the same truck and they would all travel together. That is the whole reason I chose to use Joyce Van Lines instead of another auto shipper. I wanted the Hummer to be in a covered truck and that is why I was willing to pay extra and why I arranged for it at the time of the original order. My car went in an open carrier without my knowledge, without their first consulting me to find out if that was acceptable, and it was delivered filthy.

This is now the third incident in which I was not informed of a change in the original service order: 1) the change in delivery window from Dec. 9th to 19th, 2) the charge to my American Express card for the original order and then a second charge for the additional items, for which I was charged with out being informed of the difference in weight or cost between my original order and the additional items, 3) the change in the auto shipping method and charges.

In my original estimate, I was to be charged $1,261 for 1200lbs shipped from Fort Lauderdale, Florida to Evergreen, Colorado. Then, they offered to move my furnishings and car for a total of $3,000. However, if I was being charged $1549 for the car being shipped, this means that I was actually being charged $1451 for furniture, not $1261, which would equate to a greater weight allowance. Additionally, when my furniture arrived, they moved it to a 17 foot U-haul to transport it to my house. I was stunned when they opened the back of the U-haul truck to find that my entire shipment only filled half of the U-haul. This lead me to believe that they grossly overcharged me on the weight of my household goods shipment.

It is impossible that the small addition of furniture amounted to an additional $1579.00 over the original estimate, when the original shipment was picked up they said that my original shipment of boxes was less than 1200 lbs, so I added the furniture. However, I find it difficult to believe that those few additional items were equal to $1779 ($1579 + $200 ($1451 - $1261).

*********

It's times like these that I wish I had a husband or a strong-willed person like my sister-in-law, Heidi, in my corner. Threats from a corporate entity are scary and intimidating. I can only deal with them in the only way I know how, which is to speak out and tell my side of the story.

10 December 09

2009-12-10T12:51:00.002-05:00

The stunning sub-zero weather that greeted us when we arrived and then stayed on like an uninvited guest for the first week, freezing pipes not once but twice, obliterating my attempts at snowblowing, slipping through the leaky window panes, fighting our attempts to stay warm...that bad old Mr. Frost has left, for now.

In fact, his exit was rather dramatic, through the night a howling wind blew through the trees and banged against our wooden house. As I lay snuggled in bed I thought of the snow drifts it was creating and contemplated how nice it would be if those strong winds blew the driveway clear of the snow that had newly fallen after my first snowblowing adventure.

What a nice surprise it was then this morning when I walked outside and found that the wind had in fact done just that. The driveway was clear of snow of all but the tire tracks of the plumber that had come twice to thaw the frozen pipes. There was only the drifts of snow around my rented SUV to clear with the snowblower, much less work than I'd anticipated (yes that is a picture of me with the snowblower).

And so today I'll venture out and get a PO Box that will in one more symbolic and real sense signal the reality of my move here, and allow me to enjoy all those $5/year magazine subscriptions I signed up for through Amazon.

7 December 09

2009-12-07T21:54:00.000-05:00

Today was a housekeeping day, not cleaning but other equally mundane tasks such as ordering a PO Box online from the local post office since we cannot get mail delivery at the house. I also learned a new skill today: how to operate a snowblower to clear the snow from the driveway. No, I don't have an actual photo of the miraculous event, you'll just have to take my word for it and use the accompanying photo and your imagination to picture me in the act. And finally for dinner tonight, I made meatloaf and kale with bacon and onions. I know, it doesn't sound glamorous but it was in fact very delicious.

4 December 09

2009-12-04T21:58:00.001-05:00

We are now in our second day at our Swedish farmhouse in Evergreen, Colorado. The adventure has just begun but it has already been event filled. We arrived on the evening of the 2nd Dec at 6:30pm with our two yorkies, five pieces of luggage and Mom's walker. The temperature was 10 degrees and it had snowed during the day so the roads were icy. Before we left Fort Lauderdale we were informed that our car and furniture and boxes that we'd shipped ten days prior would not arrive until Dec. 14th, instead of the expected Dec. 4th date we'd been told. This meant that we had to rent a car, in this case, given the weather and our destination of a mountain town we had to rent an SUV, not an inexpensive proposition for ten days.

We loaded up the Chevy Tahoe and started the drive up I-70 to Evergreen, slowly. I hate to drive at night, on expressways, and the last time I've driven in snowy conditions was 13 years ago when I lived in Incline Village, Nevada. This may explain why it took us about two hours instead of one to get home. We finally arrived at 10pm and were greeted by the lovely view of the outdoor spotlights that sit beneath the Aspen trees and light up the house, creating a beautiful scene as we approached. We were too tired to open the celebratory bottle of wine we'd brought, instead simply wanting to go to bed, as it was already midnight back in Fort Lauderdale.

The next day I woke at 6:30am and went downstairs to see the most beautiful view of the mountains in their blue predawn splendour. It was even colder than the night before, six degrees. We spent the day getting our bags unpacked and groceries ordered from the local supermarket which amazingly actually offers home delivery for a nominal fee, a convenience which seemed the perfect solution to avoiding a trip out in the cold.

Our property manager came out to do the walk through and told us that we had to leave cabinet doors open underneath the sinks that were attached to outside walls to avoid frozen pipes. This would be an important, albeit too late, bit of information. When evening came we finally got to open that bottle of wine and enjoyed it sitting in front of the fireplace, feeding the fire with log after log, and the cd player with an endless stream of music since our cable had not yet been set up and we were without tv.

This morning the weather finally turned warmer, we actually reached a high of 32 according to the internet weather forecast, though our outside thermometer read only +20 F. I took advantage of the weather to shovel the snow from the driveway and the outside deck and to bring in more firewood from the stack next to the house. Mom spent the day making a minestrone soup that was to be our dinner tonight. She began by soaking the beans last night and then putting them on to boil around 3pm this afternoon. It's now nearly 8pm and the beans are still boiling and just barely less than rock hard....we've just received a call from our property manager who just started laughing when I told her this, apparently high altitude cooking and beans do not go together, which is why most people up here resort to pressure cookers. I anticipate we will have soup around 10pm. When I informed her that we'd planned to have pasta tomorrow night, she started laughing again, apparently boiling a pot of pasta can take an hour and a half.

As to why I was speaking to the property manager on a Friday night....remember the admonition about frozen pipes? Well, we took the precaution of keeping the cabinent doors open as advised, and yet as I walked by the front door windows this evening I noticed a waterfall...I ran to the door wondering if it was raining outside. It wasn't. It was a waterfall caused by a leak in the pipe in the upstairs bathroom sink. I ran upstairs to find the floor covered in water. I quickly turned off the water switch and then ran back downstairs to address the flood now making a puddle outside the front door and leaking into the front foyer. Piles of towels and a frantic call to the property manager and a visit from the plumber is scheduled for 'sometime' tomorrow. Luckily the water seems to have stopped dripping.

And just for the heck of it, we are forecasted to have more snow coming in this weekend. I've got the grocery delivery guy on speed dial and an order of wine on the way.

23 November 09

2009-11-24T20:58:00.000-05:00

A really big moving truck came to our house loaded the remaining furniture we are shipping and then they loaded the Hummer. That was fun to watch.

And now I am driving a rental car, cleaning closets, getting ready to pack my suitcase, getting the dogs ready for their flight, and baking pecan pies and cookies for Thanksgiving. Whew.

2009-11-21T20:25:00.000-05:00

Well it's official. The movers came today to get our stuff. We wanted to get it on the truck and out of our condo early so that we could spend our last week here getting the rest of the condo straightened out. It will also allow us to enjoy a relaxed Thanksgiving feast with friends before we leave the following week. We're having our Hummer shipped since we didn't want to chance a drive in unpredictable winter weather, so we'll leave Florida and arrive in Colorado all in the same day!

I can't begin to describe how tired I am, but also how thrilled I am that the boxes are gone and with them there is a finality that this is really real, no looking back!

14 November 09

2009-11-14T10:54:00.002-05:00

This has been a very productive week. We now have 40 packed boxes and last night I made arrangements for all the utilities, cable, and internet to be placed in my name. Incredibly I was able to accomplish all of this over the phone and online. Yes, I am old enough to remember when this same project would have entailed car trips to each service provider, long waits in long lines and inevitably tears of frustration. Yet another reason to celebrate the joys of progress and the Internet.

I decided to fly and have my car shipped, so yesterday I bought one-way plane tickets to Denver and arranged a rented car while we wait to mine to arrive. I also spent a great deal of yesterday searching for a reliable auto transporter and a mover, which seems like an oxymoron given the consumer horror stories one reads about cars held hostage or lost or delayed or household goods broken or lost in transit or held for ransom when the original cost suddenly doubles once it reaches its destination. This search entailed one screen open to google to check reviews of each company, one to the Better Business Bureau to check their rating, and my phone nearby to answer their calls. I have finalists in each category and will have the whole things wrapped up on Monday.

All of this is to provide a progress report on our move and to justify why I woke up this morning dirt tired and a bit crabby and with every plan to spend the entire morning in bed (yes, noon.). Of course, this would also be the morning that my mother had scheduled cleaners to come to the house to wash windows and screens and take apart ailing window registers, as part of the major cleaning before we leave effort (she's also having the place painted after we leave...I think she's got ulterior plans....). Somehow they neglected to consult me on the timing of this event and I had no choice but to jump from bed, throw on shorts and t-shirt and head to my current outpost in exile, the public library, where I will spend the morning until I run out of options. At which point I'll head to the beach, still tired but at least surrounded by better scenery.

2009-11-07T20:12:00.001-05:00

Packing packing packing. Even though I'm only taking six months worth of stuff AND moving to an already furnished home, it's amazing how much there is to pack. There is adelicate balance between taking what I want (Christmas decorations) and what makes sense (don't pack the tree, buy an inexpensive one there). I'm so looking forward to having a home to call my own, I just have to remind myself that this, while temporary, is still one step closer to my goal. Patience, Suzanne, patience. Take a breath and savor the journey.

And with that sage advice, I'm off to enjoy a nice glass of red wine.

5 November 09

2009-11-05T17:29:00.003-05:00

Since we've chosen a six month furnished rental, we really don't need to bring much with us other than our toothbrushes and a change of underwear. Okay, there's going to be a few boxes of clothes as well and maybe a couple boxes with Christmas decorations because while not practical, who wouldn't want to decorate for a White Christmas in Colorado? Given small amount we're taking we'll just ship it out.

Now the question is: what's the best way to get ourselves out there? Should we ship the car by auto transport and fly out with our two yorkies? Or should we drive the 2000 miles? Currently I'm gathing info on what the actual dollar costs would be under either option.

Here's some considerations for each scenario:

Ship and Fly:

Pros: It's convenient, especially given the unpredictability of winter weather.

Cons: It's expensive. Any way I crunch the numbers it will cost more to pay an auto transport company to ship the car, buy one-way tickets for two and two dogs, and then rent a car in Evergreen while we wait for my car to arrive. But maybe it's worth the extra cost?

Drive:

Pros: It's less expensive than the ship and fly alternative. We get to enjoy the scenery of a cross-country drive.

Cons: Health and safety considerations for driving with an elderly person and two dogs for 2000 miles. This precludes long-haul drives, instead we'll make frequent stops to stretch our legs, which will mean that while Google Maps suggests we can make it in 1 day and 9 hours, we'll probably take 3 - 4 days. I'll be driving my H3 Hummer, not a Prius....I've estimated gas costs at $500.00.

If you have any experience with a long distance move or thoughts you'd like to share, please leave a comment. Thanks!

31 October 09

2009-10-31T20:13:00.000-04:00

In the end Evergreen, Colorado won my heart. I've signed a six month lease for a furnished home there and will be moving on December 1st. It's a wonderful way to end the year and a perfect place to start the new one. I have a lot of work to do in the next month as I finish packing and make arrangements for the move. Once I get there, I'll have to start looking for a job and then eventually a house to call my own. But tonight, I just want to savor my happiness at the completion of one journey as I look forward to the beginning of another.

29 October 09

2009-10-29T13:02:00.002-04:00

Mom and I had a wonderful trip to Evergreen and Colorado Springs. I was surprised at how well Mom fared in the higher altitudes of Colorado. Three years ago when we visited Evergreen she was overcome by the effects of being 7500 feet above sea level after just the second day and spent the rest of the visit in her hotel room, unable to join us as we toured the area. This year, she was amazing. She was there for every house tour, every car trip up and down the mountains as we searched for our home away from home.

We found a couple great prospects and are now just waiting for the right one to come through. We also met some wonderful people through the homes we stayed in via VRBO.com. Our experience with both homes was incredibly positive and I would recommend them as an alternative to hotels for extended stays, especially for families.

So that's where we are.....waiting. Satisfied that we've chosen the right place for us, but anxious that we haven't found the right house. We're now back at home packing up and with plans to rent out our Florida condo as Mom will be joining me in Colorado. We plan to begin a lease on our new home December 1st.

12 October 09

2009-10-12T14:06:00.001-04:00

Tomorrow I'm heading out to Colorado for a five day investigative trip. I will spend three days in Evergreen, which is where I spent the month of September last year...a rather glorious month of writing every day and watch election news commentary every evening. Toward the end of the week, I'll head down to Colorado Springs for two days to look at rentals there as well as to drive around the city and get a feel for the area. I haven't been to 'CoS' in years and really don't remember it. In both Evergreen and Colorado Springs, I will be staying in houses that are prospects for rentals which will give me the opporutnity to 'test drive' each place to see how it feels.

By the way, one travel tip I'd love to pass on: if you have an extended trip, check out http://www.vrbo.com/, often you can rent an entire beautifully decorated house for the price of a hotel room. So instead of being stuck in a small room and eating every meal at some fast-food chain, you can relax in a spacious home and enjoy your own homecooked meal. This is a particularly good deal for families and a great way to get a feel for an area from a residents perspective rather than a tourist's.

So I'm ready for this trip, I've got comfortable accomodations to look forward to, homes to visit, and hopefully some beautiful sights to see. And then it will be decision time. November will find me somewhere....I've had difficulty sleeping this past week which is what happens when I have a lot on my mind. I either have difficulty getting to sleep at night (to which problem I address by reading myself into somulance) or I wake up at 5am with a mind full of worry. When the 5am situation happens I start talking to God. And I try 'positive thoughts'. I remind myself that some of the best things that have happened were completely unexpected, so I remain open to the possibility of a positive outcome instead of worrying about my lack of a decision.

25 September

2009-09-25T15:41:00.008-04:00

Here's just how weird life can be: Last week I'd completely written off Lake Tahoe. I made an aggressive offer on a rental house, which I didn't expect to be accepted and then flew home at peace that I needed to move on to a more affordable town.

This week I've been trying to find rental home prospects in Evergreen and Colorado Springs. You wouldn't believe how difficult this is turning out to be: there seem to be few houses available, especially in Evergreen, they are unfurnished (which means I would have to move my furniture out, whereas the houses in Tahoe are furnished which allows me to take a six month rental and see how things go before moving everything), they may or may not allow dogs, and most surprisingly they are more expensive than Tahoe. I'm having a little better luck in Colorado Springs, but it would mean living in a sub-division rather than the mountains, but maybe that will be what it takes to get started.

Then the agent in Tahoe called and let me know that the landlord had accepted my offer. Then another landlord on a second home I'd considered sent me an email and made a very attractive offer.

I don't know what all this static means. After my epiphany in Tahoe, I expected smooth sailing to Colorado. What to do? On the one hand: go to Tahoe for six months and see what happens. On the other hand: I long to get my stuff out of storage and into a home in a community where I have a better than average chance of affording a home, which is Colorado. I really want to settle down in a home surrounded by my own things, which have been in storage forever, not someone else's.

At the moment I'm trying not to read too much into these unexpected developments. I'm still planning on flying out to Colorado next week to look around and then make a decision. I'm also going remain perfectly open to finding and realising the best place for me to be.

Sept. 26th in my email this afternoon, a daily devotion from Today's Daily Word seems particuluarly appropriate to this situation:

Today's Daily Word - Saturday, September 26, 2009

Let Go, Let God

I open to Spirit and follow divine guidance.I have journeyed to a crossroads of opportunity. This is a place for me to pause and reflect upon the road I have been travelling and the choice that lies ahead. I imagine that I have just walked through the desert and have now reached an oasis with refreshing water, a cool breeze and a hammock tied between two shade-giving trees. I have reached a welcome refuge. I experience this kind of an oasis as I let go of personal striving--trying to do it all myself--and let God guide me. A sense of calm washes over me as I release my concerns and trust that God will show me the way. I pause, I listen and I discern the guidance I have been seeking. Following the guidance I receive leads me to my greater good.

"If we live by the Spirit, let us also be guided by the Spirit."--Galatians 5:25

22 September 09

2009-09-22T15:43:00.002-04:00

Joy is not geography.

That is the big lesson I learned last week. I spent a few days in Incline Village, and yes, it will always be one of my favorite places on earth. But what I discovered while I was there is that right now it's not the right place for me. The home I've always wanted is beyond my financial means there and while I did find a nice house to rent, at the end of six months I'd be back where I started. But here's the big discovery: as much as I loved it, I could and would be able to find joy elsewhere. As a friend of mine said, " your joy is inside of you, has been all along."

So where does that leave me now? I'm heading to Colorado next weekend with three towns to visit and a home to rent.

2009-09-15T23:31:00.001-04:00

Tonight I am in Tahoe. As I drove up Mount Rose Hwy ' I am home' popped into my head. I am still plagued by fears that I am over-reaching my abilities, that I will not be able to find a job here or if I do I won't be able to afford a home. I don't know what to do about those fears or if I will be able to overcome them to choose this place rather than the more practical Colorado. I don't know what I will choose, but for the next two days at least, I know this feels like home.

4 September

2009-09-04T20:58:00.004-04:00

I've made reservations. I will be heading out to Lake Tahoe in the middle of September, to spend two days looking at rental homes. (I spent the day looking at prospects online). If all goes well, I will begin renting there in the middle of October.

1 September

2009-09-01T14:39:00.008-04:00

Park City / Heber Valley, Utah was lovely, but not for me. From a physical standpoint it had all the features I am looking for in a prospective hometown, but lacked that 'aha' feeling that would tell me I've found home. It was, however, good to confirm my feelings and to at narrow down the prospects by one more.

So, now we are down to the final two, not surprisingly they are the same two that have remained in that position for most of the past year: Incline Village / Tahoe and Evergreen, Colorado. The choice between the two is between my heart and my head. Incline Village is my heart's desire, I love the feel of the place, the mountains and lake, but I worry whether I will be able to find a job there or a house I can afford. Evergreen is more practical, Denver and the jobs it holds is nearby, the cost of housing is within my budget.

Let me illustrate this dilemma more explicitly: Here's my favorite house: 1011 Apollo Way, Incline Village, Nevada it's currently listed at $1.2 mil. Here's a fairly comparable house in Evergreen, Colorado (and one of my favorites in that area) it's listed at $450,000. I don't know how to reconcile that difference.

That's where I am at present. While I mull this over, I look at websites for each location checking out their houses for rent, which is what I will do when I first move, and then buy once I've found a job. I also continue to pack, this morning I finished off two more boxes before leaving for work. This month I will fly out to the chosen location and rent a house and then arrange the move.

As usual, I don't know where I'm going, but I'm moving forward anyway!

24 August

2009-08-24T15:09:00.005-04:00

Tomorrow I leave for Park City / Midway, Utah for a long overdue exploratory trip out west to check out one of the places that I have been checking out online. Two things draw me to this area: snow and affordable real estate. The rest of what I'm looking for in a place ranges from the broad (small town, sun, affordable) to the particular (catholic church, farmers market, up and coming but laid back).

The top three contenders in the 'Where Should I Move' adventure continue to be:

1. Incline Village / Tahoe / Truckee

2. Evergreen, Colorado

3. Park City / Midway, Utah

Two close contenders are:

4. Bend / Ashland, Oregon

5. Bozeman / Livingston / Whitefish / Bigfork, Montana

Packing is going well and the timing of my move is first week of October. Does it seem strange that I still haven't decided where I'm moving????

17 August

2009-08-17T16:49:00.004-04:00

One week, what have I been up to? Packing! That's right, I continue to pack boxes of books and winter clothes. I went out and bought more packing tape and bubble wrap and then packed a box full of framed photos and icons. Little by little a pyramid of boxes is beginning to form in a corner of the living room.

Where are all these boxes going? Hmmmm.....

10 August

2009-08-10T17:37:00.002-04:00

Packing more boxes and looking at houses for rent.

4 August

2009-08-04T21:44:00.003-04:00

I started packing today! Okay, it was only four boxes, but I got started. I packed my books, and a box of winter coats. I also went through my closet and started culling the stuff I didn't want to take with me, that I wanted to give away.

It's a great feeling. No, I still haven't decided where I'm moving.....but I am moving. And the proof is that today I started packing!

25 July

2009-07-25T17:58:00.003-04:00

Reading: What Color is Your Parachute and Creative Visualization.

Doing: Looking at house rentals in my prospective towns.

I believe it's all going to come together.

22 July

2009-07-22T15:32:00.002-04:00

Incline Village, Nevada

Truckee, California

Evergreen, Colorado

Which place will I call home?

20 July

2009-07-20T15:24:00.006-04:00

I've now moved into the mode of looking at houses to rent in Incline Village, Nevada (Lake Tahoe), Truckee, California (near Tahoe) and Evergreen, Colorado (cheaper houses, better economy, more jobs?). Since I don't have a job out west yet buying a house is probably premature, even for me, the perennial cart-before-horse type. Today I am querying property managers in each place asking for monthly rental rates on specific houses I see on their websites. I'm excited to be moving forward again after getting stuck for a while.

The plan is go out there, satisfy my desire for change of seasons, look for work and shop for houses.

When I'm feeling scared about this whole endeavor, I find it helps to take baby steps and sneak up on the thing slowly.

Every day do one thing.

15 July

2009-07-15T15:36:00.006-04:00

I know, I know. Nine days since I last posted a progress report here. I have not been completely idle in that time. I have been on a career exploration/hunting bent during this time. I am emailing my resume to headhunters, I am reading two terrific career-search books, the classic What Color is Your Parachute and a highly recommended The Pathfinder. And I had a free resume evaluation completed.

I also continue to contact real estate agents to discuss the relative merits of homes in their area. Most recently the Big Fork and Lakeside Montana areas, sitting on opposite sides of the Flathead Lake in northwest Montana. The cost of real estate is much more reasonable, however, the winters are very grey and the town's population drops from a summer-time high of 10,000 to 1,500, which doesn't sound great for the sense of community I was looking for.

Yesterday I did some online research looking for feedback on what it would be like to be a single, non-Mormon, woman living in Utah. The results were mixed but overall not positive for career or dating prospects. Which gives me pause about Midway and Heber City, although I understand that Park City is much more liberal and diverse, though touristy.

More than anything I have been suffering from a case of being blocked by fear. Apparently I am not alone. As I was skimming through Parachute (2008 edition) last night I came across an entire chapter devoted to why we get stuck and how to get unstuck. Bolles' sites brain research that suggests that we get stuck because our left, rational, brain wants to keep us safe and therefore sends us fear signals that fill our minds with doom and gloom messages that we are making the wrong decision and should stay put rather than embark on any new risky adventure. This message is in conflict with our right brain which is encouraging us to take risks and try new things to grow and enjoy life. When the conflict is strong enough we simply get stuck. Which is where I am right now....I am stuck and my chest feels full of fear of making the wrong decision and depressed at my inability to decide.

One question keeps playing in the back of my mind: if money was no object, if you had only one place to choose, where would it be? The answer is of course: Lake Tahoe. And a friend actually said in that case, go, rent a house and see what happens. Leave it to the fates instead of finding another place grounded in more realistic housing prices? This is my Occam's razor, the horns of my dilemma. This is the question that has ground me to a halt and reduced me to a quivering, fearful mass of indecisive jelly.

6 July

2009-07-06T16:35:00.005-04:00

I'd like to say that everything is going swimmingly, but that's simply not true, though I have hopes that an epiphany is imminent.

Saw friends this weekend who are sure that my moving away from Florida is a mistake, or at the least should be undertaken on a temporary basis of 3 months a year, and not on a permanent basis. They are afraid that I am making a mistake, will move to a place where I know no one and be lonely, and have advised renting before buying.

Here's a picture of a 4/2 house in a little place called Lakeside, Montana. It has beautiful views over Flathead Lake and can be purchased for the very reasonable sum of $249,000. I have never been to Lakeside, it looks like a lovely area, though according to the data I've seen on City Data's very useful webite, it's not the sunniest place during the winter....which doesn't bode well for my Seasonal Affective Disorder which I don't have yet but I'm sure to develop as soon as I'm placed in the midst of a long grey winter. According to the graph, I can expect two of three or at most every other day to be overcast. On the other hand, at least I can afford the homes in this area and the scenery is beautiful....would that be enough compensation? Speaking of compensation, is it even possible to find employment in such lovely settings? My wanderings around City Data's forums reveals a lot of griping about the low wages in Montana. I wonder if this is true or simply written by locals who would like to keep further migration to their beautiful state to a minimum.

1 July

2009-07-01T18:44:00.006-04:00

I tried something new today: am trying out Resume Rabbit, a resume delivery service that promises to post your resume on 89 of the most popular job sites. Since I spent most of Saturday doing this myself, I hesitated to pay someone else to continue the effort on my behalf. Then I realized in a cost analysis of resume/hr basis, they were well worth the nominal price. Now let's see the results.

Onto the ongoing location debate: as I mentioned in yesterday's post, there are certain specific criteria that I would love to find in my next community. I listed a few, but I thought it might be a useful excercise if simply for clarification purposes to make a list of them, going into greater detail. I might even share them here. Who knows, maybe someone will read them and say, "I know just the place!"

You know, that old 'put it out there to the Universe' riff? Yeah, that one.

photo credit: Breckenridge, CO

30 June

2009-06-30T16:20:00.003-04:00

Yesterday I applied for five jobs via a job site I signed up with on Saturday. Doing more management of the sites today.

Am still in a state of undecidedness about the where part of the equation, still interested in Incline, but not sure I can make the money side of it work.

Wanted: a small mountain community, quaint pedestrian-friendly downtown with cafes, shops, farmers market on Saturday, a Catholic church, a community that has a positive sense of place, affordable house prices ($250K - $350K). A place you want to call home.

photo credit: Frisco, CO

27 June

2009-06-27T14:25:00.004-04:00

Today I systematically work my way through a list of online job sites, recruiter sites, specialist sites, creating accounts and posting my resume. It feels great to be productive, though I've realised that there are many, many places to visit. This is a first step, to get my resume out there, to make my presence known. Next comes the follow up, as I know there are millions of others who are doing the same each day in the job hunt. Of course there are also millions of others who are not making the effort. So I'm one step ahead of them!

Interesting tidbit I pick up today: Google: best job search sites returned a host of interesting articles and sites that provide a list of the best job search sites to quickly determine where to post

Also heard from my realtor in Incline Village today about the foreclosure market there which is bringing houses closer to my price range.

BTW, it's pouring rain in sunny FLA, a good day for online endeavors.

23 June

2009-06-23T17:10:00.002-04:00

Completing my new improved resume has energized me. For the past two days I have been posting my new resume on job boards, replacing the old with the new on current boards, and applying to jobs that more closely match my interests. What a refreshing change!

A friend recently returned from a holiday in Victor, Idaho (on the other side of the pass from one of my favorite places in the world Jackson Hole, Wyoming). He was so enthralled with the beauty of the place that he is now looking into buying a second home there. Another acquaintence of my mine, after a 2 1/2 year search, has just purchased and moved into a new home right around the corner. Two extremes in timelines but one commonality, they made the move. And that's what I want to do, I don't want to move, I want to own. I still don't know where I am going in September, but I am going west.

19 June

2009-06-19T15:37:00.004-04:00

I'm proud of myself! I completed my resume revision / overhaul today. Despite my initial fears and even some trepidation at points, I found the experience to be creative and freeing. In the past, I chose careers in business / sales because I thought they were 'safer' than pursuing my passion for books. This week as I revised, I purposely focused on tweaking my resume with a new career in mind. This felt incredibly liberating, like beginning a new path and the impetus to do things differently this time, to pursue my interests instead of the safety of 'should do'. I've already found a couple jobs I want to apply for with this new resume and outlook in mind....we'll see what happens next.

Have a great weekend.

photo credit: The Legend of Spyro: A New Beginning (xbox)

17 June

2009-06-17T18:03:00.005-04:00

I had a breakthrough today. I'm working on my resume. Not just looking at books about resumes or reading job postings on the web, actually revising my resume. I know this doesn't sound like a momentous event, but for the past month I have struggled with a fear block around this project. Every time I approached it I was struck by anxiety and the certainty that I was unqualified to do anything, that any job I actually wanted was beyond my reach so, really, why bother updating a useless resume.

Today, somehow, that didn't stop me from opening my files and getting to work. Sure, the old tape was still playing in the back of my mind, but it was competing with another soundtrack that said, 'hey, this isn't so bad, it might even be mildly entertaining.'

I want to do another shout-out to a book I mentioned in yesterday's blog: Start Where You Are, by Chris Gardner, the guy who inspired the movie The Pursuit of Happyness (based on his memoir). I have/will read many books in the self-help/career search genre this year. So far, Mr. Gardner's book is by far the best I've read (actually listened to as an audiobook). Perhaps because he is speaking from hard-won experience and a real passion to help others, his words ring true and possible. One thought that sticks with me, even though I've heard it before, if you really want to succeed work for yourself. Be an entrepreneur. Work for yourself.

Oh, and I also went for a run this morning. Third one this week.

photo credit: http://www.paragonfineart.com/artists/aldo-luongo.html

16 June

2009-06-16T16:50:00.006-04:00

At Harvard they call the study period before final exams "Reading Days". It also describes where I am. Last night I finished Creative Careers for Unconventional People and today I've begun 48 Days to the Work You Love. In the car I'm listening to Start Where You Are.

Yes,there is a sameness about the career tests and job hunting strategies that each book offers. But if there is one Golden Rule it is this: Do What You Love. Each book sited personal stories and research that demonstrates that the people who are happiest and most successful in life have discovered what they love to do and found a way to incorporate that into their careers. Of course due to the constraints of talent or circumstances there also seems to be some limits in one's ability to make a financially viable career of one's passion. Which may be why one book suggested making it a hobby with a regular 9-5 job to pay the bills. Which I suppose is the fly in the ointment of Do What You Love and the Money Will Come. Nevertheless, I've made this my totem.

By now I know my personality type from Myers-Briggs, my personal strengths profile from John Holland and my career interests from O*net. It's comforting to find that the results of all three tests present a homogeneous composite of who I am and that it's consistent with who I believe myself to be. I've also found myself writing more, perhaps this armchair career counseling has inspired me to get back to what I really enjoy. And a direction in which to head.

11 June

2009-06-11T17:26:00.004-04:00

Baby steps

Even the smallest steps keeps my forward momentum going. That was my mantra today. I still haven't decided on a place but I trust that the answer will come by my moving date in September. I remember when I first went to Tahoe is was at the end of a cross-country trip in September, I found the place and then moved into my home there the first of November.

So today, I spent time wandering around real estate websites in different locales, from Incline Village, to Midway, Utah, to the San Juan Islands off the coast of NW Washington state. (which ironically, is where I first planned to move when I left New York in 1994, you may also notice a similiarity in geographical themes between here and Tahoe, they both feature water and mountains).

I have a friend visiting for the weekend so no more updates 'til Monday. Have a great weekend.

10 June

2009-06-10T18:04:00.004-04:00

I've come to the library again after work tonight. Each day this week I have focused on describing the career I want or finding career descriptions that I will be able to use in my updated resume. My desire is to find a career involving books. Ultimately, to be a published writer, in the interim to work with books. On Monday, I went through the Publishers Lunch database of job postings to find out where jobs in publishing were and what skills they required. Needless to say, like any business they require every aspect of a traditional business from finance, to sales, to marketing, to producing the product, editorial. Given this, there should be a variety of ways for me to enter the industry. The challenge is how to convey my skills from previous work experience in my resume to make me a contender for one of these jobs. Or to find a job in another industry that uses the skills I enjoy within that particular industry.

At the library I am once again reading The Career Guide for Creative and Unconventional People. Tonight we're focusing on skills assessment. How would you answer the following questions:

What are you doing when you are so engrossed or absorbed or involved that you lose track of time?
In what kinds of activities, relative to yourself, not to others, do you make the boldest choices and take the greatest risks?
What are your occupational daydreams? Look for themes in the kinds of work you imagined yourself doing as a kid.
How quickly do you accomplish certain tasks?

The author, Carol Eikleberry recommends taking the Ball Aptitude Battery, or the O*Net Ability Profiler or the skills analysis in What Color is Your Parachute to identify your natural skills and with that information to learn which jobs use those skills. The result being that if we are doing a job that uses skills we enjoy, we will enjoy our jobs.

Eikleberry then breaks the skills into three categories by how the skill is utilized. Are you working with ideas, with people, with things?:

Information e.g. writers, coordinators, investigators
People e.g. mentors, instructors, supervisors
Things e.g. designers, food preparers, model builders

My preference is working with information. Once you have identified a category that is a fit with your skills, you are directed to a list of careers that match these criteria. And then the fun begins, taking action to obtain or create a career that best fits your identified skills and interests.

The library is closing now. We continue tomorrow.

6 June

2009-06-06T15:18:00.003-04:00

Got up this morning ate breakfast, went for a run, did some laundry, walked the dogs, and then headed off to the library. Decided to decidate the day to those career guides I've checked out of the library but avoided reading. Tucked into The Career Guide for Creative and Unconventional People, by Carol Eikleberry. Despite its dorky title, it's one of the most useful and informative career guides I've read as it offers quick assessments, realistic stats, and encouragement. It pointed me to O*Net a very useful website that offers a variety of free occupational assessments and information. I took the career interest profile, based on the Holland test of career types. The test scores you according to six Holland career types: artistic, social, enterprising, investigative, realistic, and conventional. By selecting your interest or dis-interest to several career scenarios, your interests are ranked in each of six areas.Here is how I scored in each area:

Artistic 27
Investigative 7
Social 5
Enterprising 4
Realistic 0
Conventional 0

The last two scores are spot on, don't you think?

You can then generate a list of careers that are consistent with these interest rankings. Among the careers that had AIS codes and matched my results were: creative writer, editor, librarian (although the last time I asked my local librarian what he thought of me becoming a librarian, he choked back a gafaw and said that would be the equivalent of employing the soup nazi.) Interior designer and set designer were also listed, but I don't see myself doing either. These test results reinforce what I've learned from other career assesments and are consistent with my INFP profile from a recent Myers-Briggs test I took online last month. My 'aha' moment of the day today actually came from the following quote: "Your work environment is likely to be more important than you think and to affect not only your feelings of happiness and self-worth but also your physical health....work environments tend to be dominated by workers of similar type. You will feel most 'at home' in a work environment that fits your career type." I am glad that I kept the commitment I made to myself in yesterday's post.

05 June

2009-06-05T17:20:00.003-04:00

Just a quick check in:

Each day this week I have either added to my resume work- in- progress and / or applied for jobs.

Will do more of the same this weekend at the library.

And of course I'll continue to look at houses!

3 June 09

2009-06-03T15:49:00.006-04:00

I greatly appreciate the feedback I received on my last post. My decision is down to Tahoe/Incline Village versus Park City/Midway Utah. You've really captured my dilemma, it's a decision about whether I want more house or more location. I don't know the answer to that question, (I can frame arguments for both sides) so I'm going to put it on the back burner and let my subconscious stew on it for awhile.

In the interim, I'm focusing on the job hunt. The stars seem to be aligning in this direction and I am being subtly pushed to take baby steps, Exhibit A: Trish Ryan has started up year two of 40 Days of Faith, which I participated in last year and thoroughly enjoyed, the point of which is to focus on something we need to address and do so through prayer in a supportive community of others, and Exhibit B: today's post over at Notes to Self in which Kyran blogs about something she's been putting off and encourages us all to take the plunge today. But the greatest impetus came when I stopped in the library and picked up a copy of a little book by Rick Warren entitled "God's Answers to Life's Difficult Questions". As I was skimming through the first pages I came across this: "The first principle for handling stress in your life is this: Know who you are. And these simple stopped me dead in my tracks. I have been searching for the career equivalent answer to that question for the past twelve years. Who (what) am I? I don't know yet. But what I know for sure is that the most successful / happy people I know are people who love the work they do, they know who they are. So, I'm going to focus on that for a little while and see where it leads.

Here's what I did today:

I collect at job descriptions I can mine for keywords to update my resume.
I apply for a job at a terrific company in Truckee.
I enter a contest for a free resume re-write.
I update my search criteria on my job search engine.

26 May

2009-05-26T16:46:00.006-04:00

Over the past five months I've listened to Steering by Starlight twice in audio book format, driving around town. However, though I've checked it out at least twice from the library, I've yet to get through the hardback and the included exercises. While checking my library book due dates this morning, I realized that the poor book is due at the end of this week and cannot be further renewed. I've resolved to finish the book this week, I've checked it out enough, this has to stop! So, I'll be working on that this week.

I've actually got a tall stack of books in the 'find yourself' genre, all checked out from the library and waiting for me to read them so that they can impart their words of wisdom on my future direction in life. Here's a sampling of the titles:

To build the life you want, create the work you love

Secrets of the millionaire mind

Mortgages for dummies

The career guide for the creative and unconventional

48 days to the work you love

I'm not sure whether these titles are 'cringe-worthy' or a sign of a seeking mind, and I guess it actually doesn't really matter. It reminds me of a time years ago when I was so desperate for direction that I went to have my tarot cards read. I don't remember the reading, but apparently it didn't do the trick since I'm still searching. Quite honestly, I'd be happier with myself if I did less searching and more doing.

As to the fear I mentioned in my last post, here's the source: the least expensive house in Incline Village, my first choice location, is currently $525K. My comfort level is $350K. For that amount I can buy a no-frills condo. My fear is that I'm being stupid to move to a place where I can't afford the home that I so dearly want (though ironically there seem to be plenty of houses that I can afford to rent). And I wonder why I can't convince myself to move somewhere less expensive where a house can be purchased. I am honestly torn on this point.

For years I've dreamed of (and saved for) owning a lovely home (my first), one that is roomy enough for friends to visit, where I don't feel cramped. I love Tahoe but is owning a condo (rather than a house) worth the price of admission? I am by turns thrilled to be moving to Tahoe in September and terrified. So here's the source of my fear: Am I being stupidly stubborn and naive by moving there, renting a house, and hoping by some miracle I'll find a house I can afford?

photo credit: http://chinavillamellera.wordpress.com/2009/01/27/fui-la-mate-y-volvi/

20 May

2009-05-20T16:37:00.003-04:00

Insomnia continues. Luckily I have some new books to read.

The good news:

I received a call from the agency handling long-term rentals in Incline Village. She suggested that I come out in July or August to tour and confirm a lease for September.
My computer has been sent back to HP for a new hard drive. It should return in a week or so. In the interim, there's the office and the library.

I'm revising my resume. I was invited to apply for another job in Denver, so I did.
Reading "To build the life you want, create the work you love". Interestingly I resisted the words at first, now I find them wise and reassuring.

I find that FEAR of making the wrong decision, of failure, is my greatest obstacle right now.

photo credit: http://www.lifepurposediscoverysystem.com/blog/uploaded_images/fear-of-failure-768216.gif

18 May

2009-05-18T16:29:00.005-04:00

Had an interesting deja vu moment today: On Sunday, I was thinking about my old address in Incline: 949 Dana Court. And the number 4 popped into my mind and a $350K price. Then this morning, I received an email via Trulia with the latest listings from Incline. There was only one, it was 949 Dana Ct. #4, with an asking price of $399K. Interesting isn't it?

The realtor who handles long-term rentals in Incline Village has not responded to the online query I sent them on Friday. So I queried them again, twice, today: once via email, once via their website, and then I sent my local realtor there in Incline an email telling her they were being non-responsive. Huh.

My computer has managed to lose it's hard drive...really....when I try to run a diagnostic test to find out why it won't run it says: 'hard disk not found'. Not good. It's still under warranty with HP but it will take two weeks for them to send out a box, ship it, fix it, and ship it back. My concern is that this is the second computer of mine in the past six months that this has happened to...am wondering if this is a security issue or a strange coincidence.

Anyway, no computer. Went to library to use theirs, a sign on the door said they were closed 'due to emergency'. Huh. So, spent weekend reading a book on resume writing and another called "To build the life you want, create the work you love".

And finally a trip back down Memory Lane: back in 1994, when I first left New York, I travelled to the San Juan Islands off the coast of Washington, thinking that I would settle there. Today, on a lark, I went to realtor.com and looked up houses on the island....seems I can afford houses there.

This is what a friend of mine once described as stumbling around like a drunken sailor.

15 May

2009-05-15T17:06:00.005-04:00

This morning I woke at 4 a.m. worried that I have not been doing enough, that I am in the same place that I was a year ago, that I want to move to Incline Village, but that I am being foolish and should (still) choose a cheaper place (though I do seem able to afford to rent a house there and contacted an agent to inquire about two of them today), that I have not revised my resume yet becaue I don't know how to write one for a job I've never had(in books) but want, rather than one that I don't (in sales) which I've had, that I have not found a job yet because I haven't completed that resume, that there are many more qualified, wiser people 'out there' who will be able to get a job, career, home before me. And that the anxiety of trying to figure out which of these things to complete first (while admonishing myself for not completing any of them yet) is causing me great heaps of anxiety which wake me at 4 a.m.

8 May

2009-05-08T12:41:00.000-04:00

Image by Today is a good day via Flickr

This week there was a terrific article in the Wall Street Journal describing the rise of freelance careerists. This alternative career path is a win-win for both the company that wants to cut down on overhead staffing costs and for the individual.

For the company, hiring freelance staff allows them to hire staff for short-term specialized projects, without having to provide a desk, a 401-K, a paid vacation plan. It also allows them a relatively painless way to increase and decrease staffing levels more fluidly in response to demand requirements.

The freelance employee makes their own hours, work where they want, chose their projects, and have multiple clients, thereby increasing potential income sources rather than relying on just one. This option would provide me, if not with full income potential, at least a soft landing in my new hometown as I look for more traditional work. Who knows, it might be a way to fulfill my desire to work from home.

How to get started? The WSJ article provided a few of the most popular sites:

There was another article on the same page (Second Act: Stories of Reinventing a Career "From Wall Street to Green Mountain) that described a man, probably my age, who left a high flying career on Wall Street (Goldman Sachs! no less) to pursue a career more in line with his interests and desired lifestyle. So he traded Wall Street for Green Mountain coffees in Vermont and from the picture in the paper, he looks pretty darn pleased with himself. This is exactly what I hope to achieve with my own move.

Absolutely inspiring.

5 May

2009-05-05T22:32:00.001-04:00

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

Created an ad to lease out my condo starting September 1st. We're going to post the ad at a local seminary to target graduate students looking for fall term housing within walking distance of their school. Nice way to insure I have to move isn't it?!

Contacted an Incline Village realtor that handles long-term rentals and told them that I am looking for a home to rent beginning in September, gave them my budget and my requirements.

Do you think that if I close enough doors, the right one will open?

30 April

2009-04-30T23:04:00.003-04:00

Image by Pierre Éthier via Flickr

Applied for two jobs in the Reno/Tahoe area.

Looking at real estate in the same area.

Every day do one thing. I'm moving in September, I'll be ready by then. (positive thinking, positive action, positive results, right?!)

28 April

2009-04-28T23:02:00.002-04:00

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

Things accomplished today:

Received a free resume critique. Apparently my current resume is not dynamic enough, but for $695.00 it can be fixed!

Real estate hunting for homes in the $350K range in Midway, UT; Bigfork, MT; Whitefish, MT; Truckee, CA; and my beloved Incline Village.

A trip may be in my future.

27 April

2009-04-27T23:00:00.007-04:00

María Santísima en sus Misterios Gloriosos" style="border: medium none ; display: block;">Image by The Omnipotent Félix via Flickr

The other day I found the post that I wrote on my other blog after my return trip to Incline Village last year. Here's a link to the post: Lake Tahoe, My Love, although the title says it all, doesn't it? It reflects where my head is at now and where it has been for the past month. My heart is in Lake Tahoe. It's where I want to live. My dilemma is that I don't know how or if I can figure out how to afford a home there.

I've been looking at alternatives in Montana, in the Flathead Lake region where I could easily afford a home, even one with a lake view for $325,000. Should I settle for a house with a lake view I can afford?

The question is: what to do? As I said in that post last August, my heart is in Lake Tahoe.

But how do you follow your heart to a place that seems too expensive to afford?

23 April

2009-04-23T13:01:00.002-04:00

Quick note: Applied for a job in the Truckee / Tahoe area today. Fingers crossed.

18 April

2009-04-18T15:39:00.005-04:00

Image via Wikipedia

In "No More Mondays" Dan Miller reminds us of the familiar quote "luck is when preparation meets opportunity". He then asks "What three things are you doing right now to prepare for greater opportunity in the coming year?"

I'm at the library right now doing one of those things: I'm focused on the job hunt end of the journey. Along with Dan's book, today I've also been reading Martin Yate's popular 'Knock 'Em Dead' series of job hunting books, practical, sensible advice on resume writing, cover letters, and interviewing... now, what do I need to do about the other two things: home and writing?

15 April

2009-04-15T06:00:00.002-04:00

Image by ~Liliana via Flickr

I have not forgotten nor abandoned this project. In fact, this project is on my mind every day. What I have reached is another one of my fear blocks called 'Suzanne Second-guessing Herself'. This is where I start thinking, 'Have I made the right decision? Have I chosen the right place? Maybe I should have chosen an easier place to move to, where the real estate is cheaper, the jobs are more plentiful, maybe this place is out of my league.' I then counter this line of thinking with these facts: when I moved to New York I never considered the cost of real estate, although it was/is one of the most expensive places in the States and I was able to find a wonderful place to live. During my last year in New York, in an attempt to be more sensible, I moved from an apartment I loved in Manhattan to a less expensive one in Brooklyn Heights. Needless to say, although my rent was less, I didn't actually save more money, I just spent it in different ways. And when I last moved to Lake Tahoe, I didn't question the cost of real estate and I found a lovely place to live. All of this seems to be evidence that when I follow my heart, things work out, but what if I've lost my mojo? What if this time the force is not with me? There was a time when I was fearless but now I have experienced so many disappointments that I have become crippled by my own fearful projections of failure before an event has even taken place. Just last week, for instance, I was turned down for a job in Denver with a major fund manager. And i was disappointed, despite the fact that I don't want to work in another large urban center, or wear a suit, or have to adhere to a 9 -5 schedule and work in an office. But I was disappointed because at least it offered security. And I suppose I see security as a balm to fear, even if it is less than satisfying.

Segueing back to real estate, right now all I can think of is: how can I afford to buy a house there, even the entry level homes are $500K, at present I could only afford a condo. If I chose a less expensive area (Montana) I would be assured of being able to buy a house right away. Every night I watch House Hunters on HGTV and those $300K McMansions outside of Atlanta or Mobile seem like such a bargain I have to ask myself if I've lost my mind?!

Moving to Lake Tahoe assumes taking a risk that my reach exceeds my grasp. Ah. This uncertainty, this fear, has stopped me in my tracks because I am afraid that I will not make the right decision, or that what I want is not possible. Should I be wise or should I be risky?

9 April

2009-04-09T14:44:00.007-04:00

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On Monday, I wrote about the four careers I've had since leaving university and listed what I loved about each one. At the end of the post I promised to return to do the same excercise, only this time to focus on what I didn't like about each job. The point of the excercise is not to be masochistic, but through this exploration of each position to figure out what I want my next job to look like (or not), because quite honestly, I'd like to get it right this time, to design a career that fits me rather than me trying to fit into it.

So, let's re-visit my work history and today we'll focus on what didn't work for me.

Career #1: Investment Banking in New York: This started out as a dream career, I was working on Wall Street in Corporate Finance for a company that rewarded my hard work with advancement and increased responsibility. Downside: after eight years in New York I realized I was not interested in being in a 'New York frame of mind' and longed for open space, more nature, fewer people, and beautiful surroundings. I loved working in the financial industry, but would have preferred to be on the 'buy-side' in portfolio management. Lesson learned, I really don't want to work in a big urban setting again. Also, next time I want to work on the buy-side rather than the sell-side.

Career #2: The Interim Years:Helping John with the early days of his business, working in a bookstore, writing a novel. My random assortment of jobs in the Interim Years between leaving New York and going overseas. Upside recap: loved working with entrepreneurs, loved working with books, loved writing and working alone from home. Downside: To work in a bookstore as a career, I'd have to own it in order to make enough money to call it a career. This is an option and I actually wrote a business plan as part of my MBA for starting a bookstore. Downside: with the advent of Amazon, and now Amazon's Kindle, yet another nail has been driven into the coffin of the independent bookstore. My all-time favorite career, is/was writing from home. It included all of my favorite components in a career, working independently, creatively, setting my own schedule, being able to do it from anywhere, performance based rewards. Love it. Downside: I haven't figured out how to get paid for doing my favorite thing, as of yet, no one wants to buy my books!

Career #3: Teaching Overseas: Loved the children, loved the long holidays, and the opportunity for international travel. Downside: because all teacher salaries are fixed according to tenure, there was no reward incentives for extra hours, extra projects, innovations, all of which I enjoyed doing. After a while, it simply became frustrating to know that no matter what I did to excel my financial compensation would follow the guidelines written on a piece of paper. Downside: no performance based pay.

Career #4: Commercial Real Estate: My second job in sales, my first with commission-only pay.I have enjoyed the freedom of commercial real estate, I make my own hours and can take as much vacation time as I want and still get work done from my computer, I am working with entrepreneurs and investors, working through a deal from start to closing is fulfilling. Downside: I do not have the classic salesman's personality that, bottom line, drives success in this career. I am an introvert, not the best personality trait for an extrovert driven environment. And while I enjoyed the freedom of a commission only pay environment, when deals dry up it can get to be nerve wracking.

Here's what I don't want in a career: corporate status or identity, I don't need my name on a business card or a title that identifies my progress. I have zero desire to ever put on a suit or wear pantyhose EVER again. No selling, unless it's one of my books!

On the other hand, what I do want is a career that feels like me. Since career search has been on my mind lately at my other blog, I wrote this week's post on finding joy in our lives. My experience has been that the most joyful people I know have found careers that are also their 'calling' or purpose in life. My desire to find the same for myself was in fact the greatest impetus for leaving New York. I remember walking home across the Brooklyn bridge one afternoon and thinking that I wanted what my brother and mother had, careers that they loved. All these years later, I believe I've found my purpose in writing, however, if I can't get paid for doing it, then I must find an alternative career and what should that be? That's what I'm searching for now. How to get paid for doing what I love.

My greatest fear is that I'm setting myself up for failure. That I have chosen Lake Tahoe, a place that I would love to live, but which is more expensive than other places. That I have chosen writing, which I'm not being paid for as that which I want to call a career. And that in the end, I will have to settle for second best, not Lake Tahoe, but Colorado or Montana, and not writing but another job in finance or sales. Or maybe there is a middle ground, a job involving books, or a job working from home...and maybe not in Tahoe, but in the mountains. The question is how many compromises will it take, how close can I get to my ultimate goal, and can I be as happy with a life in the middle ground? The people that I admire most in life are those who have found their passion, their purpose, and are living it. I have to figure out how to achieve the same in my own life (or am I asking too much?), because if I don't I will feel that I have not lived a well-lived life.

6 April

2009-04-06T22:06:00.004-04:00

Image by Marionzetta via Flickr

Is it ever too late to begin a new career?

That's what I will find out over the coming months as I go through my job search. Since leaving college over twenty years ago, I've had four career changes. I started off in New York with a Japanese investment bank. I left there after eight years and had a period of hiatus that consisted of helping my brother to launch his business, working part-time in a bookstore, and then pursing a writing career. From there, I went overseas and taught in an international school for four years, then came home and began a career in commercial real estate where I have worked for the past three years, during which time I also completed a MBA.

As I plan my next step, I believe it's useful to look back at each of these careers and to figure out what I liked about each one and what kept each from being the ONE. Today I'm going to consider what I liked about each career. Tomorrow, we'll consider what I learned was not for me.

Career #1 Investment Banking: This was my first job out of university. I fell in love with Wall Street as a high school student in my AP History class. My dream was to one day work on Wall Street, I dreamed at one point of being a foreign exchange trader (that was before I really understood what they did!). What I loved about the Street was that every day brought something new, something exciting, and the unpredictability of the market was a great leveler. Anyone could come downtown and make money. From the trading floor to plush offices of corporate finance you met people from every walk of life from the most humble beginnings to the poshest prep schools, the common denominator was hard work.

Career # 2 The Interim: When I left New York I planned to move to Orcas Island, Washington (part of the San Juan Islands and one of the most beautiful places in the world). Instead, I ended up in Tampa, Florida where I helped my brother begin his business and worked part-time in a local bookstore. The impetus behind the bookstore was that I wanted a career that involved books, and contemplated opening a bookstore (in fact, while I was still in New York and working on Wall Street, I took evening classes on the publishing industry at The New School). What I discovered is that books are merchandise and as much as I love them, shoppers were not coming in the store to chat with me about my latest favorite read, they wanted to buy or browse and leave. It was not Suzanne's salon. But I learned two things from this period, I loved working with books and with entrepreneurs.

From there, I moved to Fort Lauderdale, and then to Lake Tahoe for a year. During this period I started my writing career. As I struggled to work through the untimely death of my father, I was inspired to write. I wrote a novel on the meaning of life and our ability to transcend the sorrow of death. Unfortunately, the novel did not sell. What I learned from this experience was that I loved working from home, working independently and for myself. But most of all, I relished creating something I loved (books) and attempt to be something that I had admired since childhood (an artist).

Career #3 Teaching Overseas: I moved to Baku, Azerbaijan and worked as a teacher in an international school for four years. There I taught grades six through twelve and courses in English, History, Economics and Creative Writing. I founded a literary journal and helped to publish the yearbook. I loved my students. They came from around the world and were eager and fun and lively and taught me as much as I taught them. I also loved the large chunks of time off allowed with a school schedule which allowed me to take advantage of living overseas by traveling extensively.

Career #4 Commercial Real Estate Sales: I returned to my hometown in South Florida to care for Mom after her open heart surgery. I was blessed to re-connect with my childhood friends who also own a commercial real estate firm. Although I originally considered returning to the financial industry, I believed commercial real estate provided an opportunity to learn something new and to try working strictly on commission. I also enjoyed the independence of being self-employed as well as ability to set my own schedule and take vacations when I wanted.

Tomorrow...the downside.

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